Twilight
by Kyrillia
Summary: Twinfic. Chapter 14 up! Romance, violence, humor, tragedy - you just have to read!
1. Life after marriage

Disclaimer: I don't own the Matrix or the Twins!

Because so many of you demanded it, here's the sequel to "No woman, no cry"!

If you haven't read that yet, I would advise you to do so before reading this, otherwise you won't understand many of the jokes and implications ;-)

The story starts ca. 6 months after.

**Twilight**

A Twinfic by Kyrillia

Two eyed the heavy envelope in his hands critically.

There was no sender's address on it.

But he knew the hand writing just all too well.

A letter from Felices mother.

The old woman from across the floor left her apartment and Two gave her his best ´predator smile´. Just for fun, he added a low voiced ´good afternoon´. The poor woman clutched her bag and hurried down the stairs.

He sighed and entered the apartment the three of them shared since their marriage. Letters from her mother always left Felice in a bad mood.

He closed the door behind him and laid the envelope on the kitchen table.

Then he helped himself to another cup of coffee and entered the living room. There, sprawled on the floor, sat One, a scroll saw in his left and a building instruction in his right hand. 

Two groaned.

Since they didn't work anymore for the Merovingian they had plenty of free time.

In fact that much of free time that their lovely wife had, in a state of being highly irritated, ordered them to get a ´hobby´.

And because of that One claimed himself now a handyman.

Two shuddered at the memory of how many times he and Felice had ´accidentally´ tripped on some of his creations just to prevent ´eye cancer´and other serious mental diseases..

Carefully, he approached his brother and eyed his newest project.

"What is this going to be?" he asked sceptically.

A look of excitement crossed One's face.

"Wonderful, isn't it? That's going to be a clothes tree!"

Two tip toed in zigzag course over the carpet, which was covered in a rich selection of wood, nails, bolts, tools and sawdust.

"You know, she's going to kill you if she notices that you're doing that on her precious silk carpet!"

One decided to ignore that comment.

"Any post today?" he asked instead and wiped the sweat from his forehead, leaving a trace of sawdust on his face.

Then he reached for the hammer.

"A letter from the queen." He said sombrely. They always called Felices mother ´the queen´. 

"Oh nooo!" One groaned and tried to hit a nail into the already tormented wood.

*FLING*

The nail rebounded of the wood right into Two's direction.

Two phased and the missile passed his ghost body and hit one of the expensive lamp-shades.

"One day you're going to seriously hurt yourself!" Two promised and examined the lamp-shade. Then he turned the splitted side to the wall and tried to hide it with some of the exotic plants Felice loved that much.

**

In her private room, Felice listened to the sounds of daily life that surrounded her.

One ruining her precious silk carpet with one of his newest master pieces and Two scolding his twin for doing so. She leaned back in her chair and took another sip of orange juice. As she had invited both of them to live with her she hadn't imagined in her wildest dreams that it could be _that nerve-wracking. Robbed of their truly purpose in their digital life, it had been a hard time for all three of them to get to something that resembled a _normal_ life._

She was lucky that the apartment was her property and that they couldn't get kicked out of here. The Twins had scared the shit out of her snobby neighbours. Three of them had already moved out. In fact, old Mrs Wilson was the last one on their floor who hadn't capitulated yet.

She had called Mr Barney a few times to seek advice from him, but the answer had been the same all along. They were programmed to be assassins and bodyguards. That was their purpose in life.

Not that she was complaining.

Compared to the beginning of their relationship, they had calmed down a lot already.

Felice leaned back in her chair and closed her eyes.

This was _her room, her sanctuary._

Just hers.

The Twins were forbidden to enter here by threat of sex withdrawal.

She grinned.

That threat always worked! 

With a sigh she opened her eyes and switched her computer on. 

She had arranged to chat with Trinity in an internet chat room in five minutes.

That was the easiest way to stay in touch and they used it at least twice the week. 

"Hi Feli, how is it going?"

"Fine fine, how are you?"

"Always the same. Much work and less sleep. I send you greetings from the others!"

"Thanks. How is Niobe?"

"Well, the child comes in about three months. She's pretty fine but she orders Morpheus around like there's no tomorrow ;-)"

"How are the Twins doing? Is your flat not demolished yet?"

"Don't ask! One discovered the joys of do-it-yourself! And Two believes that he is a second Paul Bocuse!"

"He's cooking??"

"I fear!"

"An assassin who cooks?"

"Oh Trin, why can't they simply start collecting stamps or butterflies?"

"Hey, cheer up! Since our great adventure Neo is seriously interested in insurance brokerage. Do you want to know what happened?"

"Yes, tell me!"

"He said that the whole ´being the Chosen One´ thing sucks and that he needed a break. So he called himself Teo Landerson and hired in an insurance office!"

"You're joking!"

"No, I'm serious Feli!! He cut his hair and bought a grey suit. Lovely, isn't it?"

"And if you don't believe me, you can go to his office and look for yourself! I'll send you the address."

"You can count on that!"

**

Half an hour later, Felice locked her room and entered the living room.

One crawled on hands and knees over the carpet and collected nails and other things.

Felice sighed.

"One, why do you wear your coat? We're inside a building here and it..is…not…freezing..cold!"

That was another issue. They insisted wearing the same outfit day after day. Not that she disliked the silver grey clothing. At least it suited their snobby neighbour hood. But wearing their coats inside the house was a habit that she tried get rid off desperately.

"Oh…sorry." One mumbled absent minded and flung his coat onto the couch.

She groaned.

Two stuck his head out of the kitchen. Grey thick clouds followed him.

"Sit down, dinner is ready!" he announced happily and returned to the stove.

Felice looked sceptically at One who returned her gaze with a frown on his lips.

"Do you know what he has cooked today?" she whispered.

"He refused to let me in! But if it tastes like it smells…."

"We have to ´accidently´spill it again?" 

"Yep. Bon apetit!"

They sat down at the dining-table and eyed the various ´things´ Two had prepared.

"Well, help yourself!" Two smiled and piled some mysterious grey pieces of meat on Felices dish. He added a scoop full of dark green sludge and strewed some yellow stuff over the whole mess. They looked suspiciously like dandruffs.

One gulped.

"That looks….delicious! What is it, Darling?" Felice finally dared to ask.

"That is roasted chicken breast with fresh spinach and parmesan cheese!" Two explained proudly.

Under his stern gaze One slowly filled his own dish and they started eating.

Felice suspected that Two's food gradually numbed her taste buds and she was grateful for that. It was easier just to eat whatever Two cooked for them then starting an argument about his cooking skills. The last time she dared to criticize his filet stroganoff, he had slept two nights on the couch in the living room, deadly insulted. And as much as she appreciated her personal space in her private room, at night she only could sleep a decent night's sleep when both of them were around.

Must have something to do with the telepathic link, she suspected.

However, it had taken a new frying-pan and a very expensive new razorblade with silver hilt to reconcile him.

She just hoped that he hadn't made dessert too. 

The last time he had baked cake she needed a dentist afterwards.

Then she noticed the envelope next to her dish.

From her mother.

With a sigh she opened it and started reading.

Two watched her curiously.

One used the opportunity to dispose himself of the remains of his meal by hiding them in one of the nearby plant buckets.

"And, what does she want this time?" Two asked.

Felice looked up and frowned.

"They're inviting us!"

"What?" One was alarmed now.

"Yep, they have silver wedding anniversary in two weeks!"

Silence.

"And they want us to come!"

"Oh"

**

Oh oh, family celebrations…

Are they really going to visit Felices parents?

And will the Twins wreck havoc there?

Which other eccentric family members of hers will we meet?

Will we get to see Neo/Teo in his new banker outfit?

Will Two poison Felices whole family by cooking for them?

All those questions…

If you review I might write more!


	2. Love games

Disclaimer: I don't own the Matrix or the Twins..

                 Felice however, is mine!

Here we go again!

No real plot in this chapter, but I felt like writing a love scene today.

Enjoy!!

**

Two woke up to the sound of his twin rummaging through his wardrobe.

Blinking like an owl, he pulled a still fast asleep Felice in his embrace and focused his gaze on One.

The twin in question was busy putting on his clothes.

"You're really serious about that, aren't you?" Two asked sleepily.

One looked at him smugly.

"At least _I'm doing something for my health!"_

Two just shook his head in disbelief. One's newest hobby was jogging.

He even had bought a jogging suit. 

In silver grey, of course.

From Armani, of course.

And now he had made it his habit to get up in the earliest morning every day and make his rounds through the neighbour hood.

He even had made the attempt to persuade him to participate into this…this…he still was too tired to think of a proper word for this …this..

Damn!

"You look ridiculous, you know…" he yawned.

"Are you sure that you don't want to join me?" One asked.

Two grimaced.

"No thank you oh so very much. If I ever want my knees to get ruined maybe, but not today!"

One casually threw a towel round his shoulders. Then he went to the bed and planted a kiss on sleeping Felices forehead.

His dreadlocks slipped into her neck and Felice started twitching in her sleep.

"Shush, you're waking her up!" Two scolded his brother.

"I'll be back for breakfast!" One announced and pranced out of the bedroom.

"Idiot!" smirked Two silently.

There were much more pleasant ways to burn calories, he thought.

He started nuzzling Felices back.

Indeed, much more pleasant ways!

**

Two waited till he was sure that his twin was at least three blocks away.

Then he planted a line of small kisses along Felices shoulders up to her ear.

"Mmmhhh?" was the sleepy response.

He tightened his embrace around her waist and started sucking her earlobe. Her tousled hair tickled his nose.

"Mmmmhh!!" this time the response was somehow less sleepy and more demanding.

His right hand mysteriously found its way under her loose black silk top and caressed a breast.

Felice tilted her head backwards on his shoulder and slowly opened her eyes.

Two purple glittering orbs gazed lascivious at him and the corners of her mouth turned into that well-known predator smile she had at sometime adopted from them.

Two felt something familiar stir in his loins.

Oh, he was in an evil mood today!

**

The streets gradually came to life as One jogged through the park.

Nannies with small children, students on their way to school, old people and their grand children feeding the ducks on the small lake.

He increased his speed.

The gravel under his feet crunched. Today he felt light like a feather!

Then he felt a familiar sensation stir in his loins, just as he reached the more crowded area of the park.

Shit!!

Two had started touching Felice in a way only husbands were allowed to touch a woman.

And his arousal transmitted to One via their telepathically link.

He passed a bench with two old women on it.

"Eeeekk!" screeched one of them and passed out.

The second raised her umbrella and prepared to beat the shit out of him.

"Help! Help!! An exhibitionist!!" she screamed.

One doubled his speed and ran away.

Damn Armani and his far too tight jogging pants!!

And damn him for his too short sweaters!

That was one of the reasons the Twins loved their long coats. 

They covered the important parts of male anatomy safely!

Still hearing the cries for help from the old bitches, he turned around a corner.

Right into a whole bunch of school girls!

Girls between thirteen and sixteen years stared at him wide eyed. He noticed with horror that over the half of them stared at his crotch.

Whispering and giggling could be heard in the otherwise deadly silence. Some of the girls blushed deep red and pointed at him.

Then one of their teachers took a deep breath and opened her mouth.

The following shouting and the high pitched screams made him triple his speed and run for his life.

Into the woods!

There he could phase and would be safe!

**

Two lay on his back and enjoyed the pleasures his wife so eagerly gave to him.

He lazily gazed at the wall clock and pondered how long it would take One to jog the whole way back. He knew that he was being mean…

A sudden adrenaline rush told him that his twin knew exactly what he was up to.

Yes, he would return soon.

And he wasn't being _that_ mean.

If he hurried up a bit he still had a fair chance to arrive soon enough to join them on the battlefield.

Then Felices hand somehow found its way into his pyjama pants and everything else got unimportant.

**

"A sex offender!"

"There he is, someone call the police!!"

"Help! Help!!"

In an agonizing sprint One practically leaped into the safety of the park's wood.

Puffing and gasping for air he phased and floated away.

He didn't care where, just away from the screams and the sharp objects they had thrown after him.

Midst floating he felt another not unfamiliar sensation flood his body and mind.

It seemed that Felice had laid her talented hands on some special body parts of his dear twin and the sensation was overwhelming.

Just overwhelming.

In fact that overwhelming, that he phased back into solid form.

He leaned again a lattice and tried to catch his breath.

Wait a moment, lattice?

He slowly raised his head and looked around.

Yes, lattice. All around him.

Then he heard some warning growling and snarling.

He looked down.

Several big and ugly dogs surrounded him.

Very big.

Very ugly.

And they bared their fangs.

Very sharp fangs.

That was definitely not his day today!

**

Just as Two thought that they had finished with the appetizer and wanted to continue with the main course, One returned.

Two heard the front door violently crash as he tried, for the sake of his brother of course, to keep Felice busy for another few moments.

Then One stormed in the bedroom.

Two, who thought that One's excitement based on sexual desire, didn't bother to look at his twin. Instead he bent over Felice and continued kissing her, assured that One would understand the invitation and join them on the bed.

Instead he felt Felice getting rigid in his arms.

"Oh my poor baby, what the hell happened to you, sweetheart?" Felice cried and shook off Two who lay all across her body.

Quite shocked, Two fished for his sunglasses and looked at One.

His twin looked terribly worn out.

His pants were teared to shreds.

He had lost his towel.

His dreads were a mess with lots of leafs and twigs in them.

And he had covered his crotch with an old news paper.

Felice pulled One onto the bed and embraced him, then she combed the rubbish out of his hair with her fingers and rocked him comfortingly back and forth.

Finally, she snatched the tattered news paper out of his grasp.

The pants were _really_ tight.

Felices eyes grew big as she noticed the obviously arousal of her second husband.

She looked Two in the eye.

Two winced and looked slightly guilty.

Felices eyes flashed dangerously.

"Two…?" she growled.

"How could you?" she asked unbelievingly and cuddled One tight to her bare chest.

From that comfortable place of rest between Felices breasts One grinned revengefully at his twin.

Two sighed defeated and let himself fall back into his pillows while his twin disposed himself from the remains of his clothes in a flash

No question who would come first today…

**

Some serious plot in the next chapter, I promise!

Liked the love scene?

Please review!!


	3. Tom

**

Later in the morning, Felice left the house with her sports bag and a long shopping list.

She loaded the bag in her small black cabriolet and drove into the inner city. 

In a few days, they would take the plane to visit her family and she still had no clue what present to buy for her parent's wedding anniversary.

And not only for her parents. 

There were still her grandparents and a whole bunch of younger cousins who would expect at least some small presents.

Well, these she could buy with the Twins in tow. At least then she could choose in peace because no salesman would dare to pester her when her lovely husbands were around.

But before she could go shopping, her martial arts training became due.

She sighed.

Fighting had never been one of her interests, but the Twins insisted that she had to be able to defend herself properly. First, they had tried to teach her themselves.

Felice winced mentally as she remembered that disaster.

One and Two, well especially Two, weren't able to understand or simply accept that she didn't inherit their fighting skills. After all she could phase and shared their telepathically link, even if the connection wasn't as strong as between the Twins.

Two, who was a god damned perfectionist, firmly believed that she just didn't try hard enough.

It had been nerve-wracking.

Surprisingly, it had been One who had found a compromise.

She would do her martial arts training in one of the many studios in town.

But training her how to fight with her razor-blade, which she almost hated more than training kung-fu, would still be their responsibility.

After they had come to terms with that, One and Two had spent three weeks to choose a suitable teacher for her.

In their own and subtle way, of course.

This meant that they had stalked the poor men after work and attacked them in dark corners to test their abilities, of course.

And they didn't have fun thereby, of course…

Tom, her present trainer, had to wear those nice bandages for weeks.

She liked Tom; he was a nice person and a good trainer. And training with him was certainly more relaxing than training with your own husband.

There was just one problem…

Tom was a very communicative person, very curious about her personal life.

And not uninterested in her.

He had seen her wedding ring, of course.

But she couldn't introduce One or Two to him, of course. Or both of them.

Not after they had beaten him to a bloody pulp just a month ago.

And after all those weeks with her excuses, she feared that he believed that her husband was just imaginary and an excuse to keep men away from her.

**

"Hi Feli, sweetheart! How are you this wonderful morning?" Tom asked cheerily as she entered the studio.

"Oh fine, and you?" Felice asked and put her bag on the floor.

"Well, better…certainly better! Do you want to hear the news before we begin with the training?"

"Of course, what is it?"

"The police finally released a composite picture of those two mad men who attacked me last month!" he announced proudly.

"OH!"

"Do you want to see it?" he asked eagerly.

"Sure, let me see!" Felice murmured with shaking voice.

Tom gave a sheet to her.

Felice gazed at it and then audibly exhaled her breath.

Fortunately, the two ridiculous faces on the sheet had nothing in common with her beloved husbands.

She studied the picture.

Two pale and definitive ugly faces with crooked teeth and hollow eyes looked at her.

Tom, who interpreted her curiosity as fear, laid an arm around her shoulders.

"That was the fight of my life, sweetheart!" he said and put on airs.

"I kicked and punched, but they wouldn't surrender! But then I made my final move, this wonderful trick I'm going to teach you one day sweetheart, and then they went to the ground, beaten and begging for mercy!"

Felice, who knew that the Twins just had treated him kind because they wanted him to teach her and not because they weren't able to kick his ass, desperately tried to stifle a giggle that dared to escape her throat.

**

"How much time is left?" asked One, who sat cross-legged on the carpet and tried to assemble his clothes tree. Again.

Two, who just returned from buying food in his preferred super market, heaved three full bags into the kitchen. One got up from the carpet and followed him, leaving a trace of sawdust behind him. Two looked at his watch after he put down the bags.

"Just thirty minutes till we pick her up! Did you scrub the toilet like she told you to?" he smirked.

One pouted.

"Why do I always have to do that?"

"Because it was _you_ who scared the last cleaning lady away!!" Two scolded.

"I didn't!"

"Yes, you did! You've hidden behind the shower curtain, almost naked, with those awful goggles on and a rubber ducky on your head. And then you said ´Booo`!"

"You thought it was funny!"

"Thhh! You know how touchy humans can be! Stop complaining and go scrub the toilet! I'll prepare lunch in the meantime!!"

One craned his neck as Two drained the bags.

"What will you cook today?" he asked carefully.

"Tagliatelle con salmone!" Two said proudly.

"Huh?"

Two snorted.

"Pasta with salmon, nitwit!"

"Oh yummy yummy!" One sighed and left for the bathroom.

**

"Tom?" Felice asked after their training.

"What is it, sweetheart?"

"I just wanted to tell you that I won't be here the next two or three weeks!"

Tom got up from behind his desk and approached her curiously.

"I'm going to visit my family. You know family celebrations and that stuff!"

"Well, that's interesting! Where do they live?" he asked.

"Germany." Felice closed her bag and prepared to leave.

"I'm going to miss you, but maybe…who knows? The world is small!" he winked at her and took her bag.

"Let me carry this for you!"

"Thank you, but that won't be necessary! I parked just a block away!" 

With good reason, as the twins had promised to pick her up. The black cabriolet was too small for shopping. They had agreed to stay in their jeep and wait till she would come out. If Tom accompanied her, he would see them.

"Oh, but I insist! There are far too many criminals on the streets these days! I couldn't forgive myself if something would happen to you, not with these two mad albinos around! A charming young lady like you would be easy prey for them, you know!"

"But-" 

"No arguments, Feli! I escort you to your car. Really, you can be so stubborn sometimes!"

Felice sighed.

Tom grabbed her bag and together they left the studio.

As they went around the corner, Felice could already see the familiar jeep which stood right behind her own car. Two white silhouettes stood out against the windshield if you looked closer. Fortunately, Tom was so busy with flirting that he didn't notice it.

*Down!* she activated the telepathically link between them.

Two minds winded themselves into her own. For the split of a second, she could see through One's eyes, watching herself next to a tall man with short brown hair and brown eyes approaching the car. She stopped.

"Is everything alright?" Tom asked and grasped her elbow.

Anger surged through their connection.

She shook his hand off.

*Get down! Hide! He mustn't see you!"*

"Felice?"

"Uh oh, everything alright, don´t worry!"

Tom eyed her sceptically.

"You´re looking a bit too pale for my taste…I know, what about a nice hot coffee? That would be good for you now!" he suggested.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw the two white silhouettes phase and get invisible.

But the angry feeling was still there.

The Twins were definitely not amused.

Another problem she had to get rid off soon. 

Jealousy.

"Oh I'm fine!" she looked at her watch.

"Oooh and I'm terribly late! I'm sorry Tom, but I have to go now! I see you in three weeks then!!" she pulled the bag out of his hands and run the last few meters to her car and put her bag in, secretely watching Tom till he disappeared behind the corner shaking his head and smiling.

Great.

Now he thought she was being shy.

She closed the trunk and sighed.

Feeling the Twins getting solid again, she got into the jeep and sat down between them.

Two seemed to be grumpy while a highly unpleasant smirk played around One's mouth. She kissed them on the cheek.

Two, always being the one driving, started the motor.

The first minutes passed in silence.

"He touched you!" One stated the obvious.

Felice sighed. She was doing that a lot since the last six months, she thought.

"In a social accepted way!" she tried to explain.

Two's lips formed into a sneer.

"Touching other men's wives is socially accepted?" One asked acidly.

"One…." Felice said in a warning tone.

"Don't start it again! We had this discussion already! You can't murder every man who shakes my hand or volunteers to carry my bag! That's totally usual behaviour for humans!"

She took his hand and stroked it.

"We should have kicked his ass as we had the chance!" Two said quietly.

Felice rolled her eyes in disbelief.

Men!!

**

In the shopping mall

"Look at these! Nice, aren't they?" Felice said and held up two terribly gaudy porcelain figures. A shepherd and a milkmaid.

One and Two shuddered simultaneously.

Two managed to nod.

Because they had promised Felice to behave, One decided to ignore the impudent salesman who pestered his wife all the time and the fat old man, who still lingered a few meters away from them. Never getting nearer but constantly making eyes at _his wife. _

Felice gave the figurines to the ecstatic salesman who suspected the sale of his life and proceeded to look at another few representatives of bad taste.

One nudged Two in the ribs and pointed with his chin at fat man, who in the meantime pretended to study a porcelain guide while in truth eyeing Felices bottom with great interest. Two raised his eyebrow and studied the man. Then he shook his head.

He didn't want to anger Felice more than necessary.

Felice finished buying another two porcelain figures, a cupid and a horseman, and looked at the two of them.

"What about you two choosing some nice razor blades or something like that for the male part of the family?"

They entered the arms shop in the basement, where the Twins broke in some kind of hysterically euphoria while studying a hundred and one different sorts of razor- and snap blades, examining and swirling them in their hands and making comments about them.

Felice suddenly was reminded of two boys who just broke into a candy store.

She turned to look into a shelf where the owner had decorated some of the smallest silver pistols she had ever seen as she noticed a shadow lurking in the corner next to her.

It was fat man and he gifted her with a particularly lecherous gaze.

Maybe she shouldn't have worn the leather corset today?

She shuddered and stepped beside One who was busy examining a switchblade.

"Do me a favour?" she asked and fluttered her eyelashes at him.

One got that dreamy look behind his sunglasses again and nodded.

"Everything, my dear!"

"See that man over there? I want you to go and scare him to death! Would you do that for me?"

Now Two's head perked up behind another shelf with blades and he stepped beside his twin.

One's lips started quivering and he lowered the switchblade.

"Say that again!" his voice was raspy.

Felice smiled lascivious.

So that was the kind of dirty talk that turned One on?

Interesting…

Standing on tiptoes, she brought her face near to One's and whispered in a low and seductive voice.

"I…want…_you…to…kick…his..ass!" she purred._

The switch blade dropped out of his hand and onto the floor.

"Oh yesss! Baby, I love you!" One nearly cried.

Then he was gone in a whirlwind of silver coat.

She smiled smugly and turned to look at Two.

He opened his mouth to speak.

Out came just a small croak. His throat was terribly dry…

"And what do you think about this one?" Felice asked innocently and pointed at a very expensive silver dagger.

**

Thirty minutes later, they left the shop and returned to their car.

Felice didn't ask what One had done to the man; she didn't really want to know…

At least she had been able to satisfy the killer instinct in them a little and she had been able to do her shopping.

All in all acceptable results for today!

*RIP*

One of her bags had ripped under the pressure of too much horrible tawdry presents and vomited its contents out on the marble floor. 

As she and the Twins got on their knees to collect the items, Felice glanced through the shop window next to her.

Wait a minute, this face looked awfully familiar!

She nudged Two in the ribs. Hard.

"Look, isn't that Neo in there?"

**

What has One done to the man?

Will we see Tom again in this story (*wink wink, nudge nudge*)?

And will the Twins do unspeakable things to him?

Will we get to hear a speech about the joys of insurance brokerage from Neo?

And will One finally succeed in assembling his master piece of handy craft?

Be nice and review!

Reviews make me write faster ;-)


	4. A nightmare named Neo

Disclaimer:  If I would get money for this, I wouldn´t be in the desperate need for a holidy job right now!

                  Anyone out there who needs a student to wash his car ;-) ??

We´re slowly reaching the plot now…

And don´t worry, the Twins aren´t that tame yet (*evil grin*)

**

„Isn't that Neo? "Asked Felice surprised and scrambled to her feet.

She pushed her bag into One's arms and glued her face to the shop window.

No doubt, the young man in the boring grey suit and the stern expression on his face was Neo, former known as the Chosen One.

Trinity's boyfriend and source of her present distress.

"Could we move along?" Two asked bored. Neo´s new attitude didn't impress him in the least.

"Yes, could we move along?" asked One.

Felice just looked at them.

"What has gotten into you? That man in there saved our lives only half a year ago. And now that he's changed that much you don't give a damn?"

Two snorted.

"We saved our lives ourselves, if I might remember you, darling! He was just a mere hanger-on, like Niobe or Trinity. In fact, the only ones who really helped us were Mr Barney and your father! And he's there on his own free will."

One smirked.

"Yeah, if he wants to play the idiot, then let him be. He would just waste our precious time!"

He laid an arm around her waist and pulled her close.

"Forget about him, you don't need him, you've-

"Got us!" finished Two and planted a kiss on her hair.

Felice freed herself out of the tight embrace. If the Twins decided to team up against her, the telepathically link kicked in and made her quite helpless.

She tried to get her head clear again.

"It's not that I would have any personal interests in him, in the contrary I find him quite boring. But I worry for Trinity and for her sake I will now enter this office and talk to him! And you two will accompany me!!" she said sternly. The twins might not care about other people then the three of them, but that didn't mean that she had to follow their example!

Resolutely, she opened the door and got in.

The Twins followed her reluctantly and flanked her on both sides. That affected behaviour lacked a bit of seriousness because they were loaded with full shopping bags like Santa Claus. 

A young woman welcomed them.

"Good afternoon ladies and gentleman, how can I help you?"

"Yes, well….we'd like to talk to Mr…Landerson!" Felice said matter of factly.

"That should be no problem, please follow me!" the woman in brown said and led them to a small office.

They entered and One closed the door behind them.

Neo aka Teo looked up from his desk and a weak smile formed on his lips.

"How can I help you?"

Felice went up to his desk and looked into his face. His eyes were dull and he seemed to have lost weight recently. Not that he ever had been fat to begin with.

"NEO!!" Felice screamed.

"Don't you recognize us?? It's us, Felice and the Twins! Remember the hand cuff adventure in spring? We had so much fun, you, Trinity, Morpheus, Niobe and us!"

A bit of life came back into his eyes.

Must have something to do with Felices high-pitched voice, Two mused.

"Felice? Is that really you?" he asked unbelievingly.

"Oh of course, it must be you! Who else would voluntarily hang around with two albino killers? Are you still married?"

"Of course we are!" Two huffed and dropped his bags.

"Would we be here if it was different?" One sounded insulted.

"Yes, you're absolutely right…" Neo´s eyes got dull again.

"Is everything alright with you?" Felice asked worried.

"I'm fine!"

"You're looking ill!" she stated the obvious.

"Like I've told you, I'm fine! Is there anything I can do for you? Did you want to conclude an insurance?"

"No, we didn't…"

"We have life insurances, accident insurances, unemployment insurances and our special offer this week: a household insurance…"

"No, we-"

"Just 19,00 ,- per month and you´ll get a free coffee machine as welcome present!"

"We just wanted to say hello!" Felice said irritated.

"Well, hello…"

A moment of awkward silence followed.

The Twins had stopped smirking and seemed as puzzled as Felice looked.

Finally, Felice grabbed her bag and went to the door.

"Well, it was nice to see you again! Stay in touch will you? Good bye!" she said quietly and left his office.

Teo Landerson just nodded and returned to his papers.

**

Back at home Felice stormed into her private room to call Trinity.

The Twins dropped the various bags in the living room and helped themselves to a margarita. A _big_ one. 

They slumped onto the couch.

"Two?"

"Yes?" 

"For the sake of Felices mental and physical health, would you consider not cooking today and instead order pizza or something?" One asked.

Two sighed. "If you're getting me the phone…" 

One jumped up and grabbed the phone.

"He even didn't recognize us, Trinity! This is serious, I fear!"

"I know!" Trinity sounded tired.

"Did you ask him to return to Zion?"

"I did, god knows I did! But he wouldn't listen! Neither to me nor to Morpheus! What shall I do, Feli??"

Felices gaze fell onto the letter on her desk.

Her mother's invitation.

"I think, I have an idea!"

"Dessert?" Two asked.

"Yes, please! Hmmm, tiramisu….and zabaione, lots of it!!" One said eagerly.

"Ooookay, here we go!"

"I don't see any problems there, Trin! My parent's villa is big enough, even with the whole family staying in it! Two more people wouldn't be evident!"

"But how do I persuade him into visiting you?"

"He needs a holiday! If he doesn't agree…well, technically Morpheus is his superior, isn't he? If he orders him to take a holiday, would he obey?"

"And a bottle of red wine!"

"Take two! And grappa, don't you forget that!" One smirked and lighted the candles in the living room.

"If he does not agree, you'll have to force him somehow. It's for his own sake!" Felice said.

"You're right. But I don't know if I can handle this all alone…"

"Oh Trin, inspiration just hit me! We can invite them too!"

"Who??"

"Morpheus and Niobe, of course! The baby's not coming the next three months and I bet she could use a holiday right now, couldn't she?"

"Well, yes…"

"Think about it, lush green woods, soft valleys and mountains, Weiss beer, pretzels, sauerkraut…"

"Oh that sounds so good! But still I think…"

Felice decided to play her trump card.

"Dirndls…" she said seductively.

"What did you say?" 

"Dirndls! You remember how you loved to wear the one my parents gave to you in that one summer holiday?"

"You mean that red one…"

"Exactly, as we were sixteen and you have outdone me on that barn party…"

"We could get a new dirndl?" Trinity's voice sounded dreamy.

"Yes we could…" Felice tempted her.

In truth, she hated dirndls, oh how she hated them! But if it brought Trinity to her senses she would happily wear them all day long…

"And you would invite them too?"

"Yes!! And now you could talk to them, so I can phone my mother and arrange everything! Okay?"

"Okay!!" Trinity now sounded positive.

"I call you when I've booked your flights!!"

"What's that noise?" One asked irritated.

Two tilted his head and listened. Then he opened the front door and looked out on the corridor.

Mrs Wilson's shabby old dog cowered in front of her door and produced that ugly, nerve-wrecking whining sound shabby old dogs tend to make when locked out.

Two sighed.

Then a familiar scent tickled his nostrils.

He looked down with a disgusted expression.

"One!!"

"What is it?" asked his twin.

"He's done it again!" Two pointed at the pile of shit that decorated their doormat.

"That's his death sentence!" One hissed and took out his razor blade.

Two grasped his arm and looked at him quite shocked.

"Really, One. I won't allow you to torture a poor little animal!"

His twin looked at him surprised.

"You've already had your fun today! Now it's my turn!" Two smirked and whirled his own blade.

With a highly unpleasant smile that would even make up grown harsh killers cry; he approached the still whining dog.

"Come here, doggy, doggy, doggy! Come to uncle Two!"

Mrs Wilson's dog, whose tattered ears already testified several encounters with those friendly neighbours immediately stopped whining and bared his teeth.

One smirked and kicked the abused doormat across the floor.

Then he closed the door.

**

Since her mother loved to entertain the more guests the better, it wasn't difficult to get her approval to invite Neo, Trinity, Morpheus and Niobe.

She dropped the meanwhile smoking phone on her desk and got up.

That had been the easy part.

The difficulty would be to explain their new comrades to the Twins! 

She left her room and entered the living room.

She met One in there, who seemed to be listening to something.

"What is that noise?" she asked as she approached him.

One tilted his head and merely smiled. Then he raised his hand.

"Listen? It stopped!" he grinned.

The door opened and Two got in.

A very smug Two.

"Where have you been?" Felice asked.

"Oh, just checking the letter box…why don't you go to the kitchen? Dinner's ready!" he purred and gave Felice a little push.

Felice shook her head and headed for the kitchen.

Two waited till she was out of sight, and then turned to his twin.

"There are dog hairs on your coat!" One teased.

Two brushed them away with his hand and grinned.

"A pity that it's fur was so shabby! Otherwise we could have made a nice cap for Felice!"

One quietly laughed.

"What have you done with it?"

Two just grinned.

"I would advise that it is either you or me who brings the rubbish down to the dumpster, the next few days. We don't want her to get sad, do we?"

Felice loved dogs, no matter how shabby they were.

A habit that the Twins just couldn't understand. They didn't like dogs.

Well, they didn't like pets at all.

"We certainly don't want to!" One smirked and followed Two. 

Felice entered the kitchen.

Her eyes grew big as she noticed the food: pizza, seafood, various antipasti and wine.

She sighed.

It seemed that One had persuaded Two into ordering something to eat and like always, they had overdone completely.

The food on the table easily sufficed for seven people, not just three!

Luckily, the Twins still were on the Merovingian's salary list as the snobby little Frenchman wanted to keep them quiet, so money wasn't a problem.

At the moment at least.

One opened the first bottle of wine and gave a full glass to her.

She gulped its contents in one swig and returned it to him for refilling.

One smiled approvingly.

**

As she reached for another piece of pizza, it knocked on the door.

Two made a disapproving sound in his throat and wanted to get up in order to beat anyone up who dared to interrupt their meal.

Felice mentioned for him to stay and got up instead.

Taking her glass with her, she opened the door.

The sight of a very grumpy Mrs Wilson greeted her.

"Mrs Jumeaux-

"It's Mrs _Guildenstern-Jumeaux!" Felice insisted. Why were people never able to remember that?_

"Mrs Guildenstern-Jumeaux then, have you seen my dog? Poor Rufus is missing since late afternoon!"

The old woman looked quite worried.

"No, I'm sorry, haven't seen him! Did you already ask downstairs?"

Now the old woman looked sourly.

"Of course I did! But even the portiere hasn't seen him!"

She suddenly eyed the doorframe.

"Are that blood stains there?" she asked and pointed at some red sprinkles in waist height.

Felice almost dropped her glass.

Two! She could´ve guessed it!

Now what to say, what to say??

"Ehrm, yes…I cut myself when I got home today. I cut myself with…the sharp end of my door key!"

Mrs Wilson looked at her like she was completely insane.

"You've cut yourself at a door key?"

"Yes!" Felice felt a blush creep up her face.

Oh, the Twins were going to pay for that!!

"Where?"

"Excuse me?"

"Where did you cut yourself?"

"Aeehhh…my ankles! I cut my ankles!"

She sent a telepathically cry for help.

"You've cut your ankles with your door key?" the old woman asked puzzled.

Suddenly Two appeared next to her and laid a hand on her arm.

"Good evening Mrs Wilson!" he purred in that low voice that always scared the poor woman out of her skin.

She clutched her bag.

"Well, I have to go now! If you see Rufus, just knock!"

"Don't worry Mrs Wilson, we will!" Two purred.

The old woman fled.

**

"Don't!"

"But-"

"I assure you, I _don't want to know what you did to that poor animal_!" Felice fumed and entered the living room where One had switched on the TV.

While showing no trace of guilt, Two refilled her glass.

One opened the grappa.

"Dear lord, we already talked about that too! You are no longer in the service of the local gangster boss! You simply can't afford that kind of attention!"

She sighed and looked at the screen where the news started.

"…robbery in the shopping mall. The victim described the culprit as white-skinned, white-haired man, clothed with a long light-grey coat and a grey suit. He is approximately 2, 0 m tall and wears dark sun glasses. The police warn that the culprit is extremely dangerous! Any observations can be reported on 0028…."

One switched the TV off.

Felice just gaped at the dark screen.

"Well, that didn't go as planned…" One stated.

Two looked slightly worried at their wife.

Felice still sat there, staring into space, mouth opened.

"Felice, darling!" Two waved a hand in front of her face.

The wife in question snapped back to reality.

"That's it! pack your bags, we're leaving!!"she got up.

"Whoaa, sit down Cherie! Where do you want to go?" One said and pulled her back onto the couch.

"It's better if we aren´t here the next few weeks. Better for your sake and surely better for my nerves! I'm going to book the next possible flights to my parents!"

One looked at his twin.

"On the road again, yeah!!"

**

You recognize the cliché, don´t you?

Well, I am german and I can assure you that we _don´t_ run around in dirndls and yodel all the time ;-)

And like Felice, _I hate dirndls_!!

But I´m going to make fun of that, so prepare to see Trinity in a dirndl in some of the next chapters….

PS:  No dog was harmed during writing this chapter!! 


	5. Meeting the family

Disclaimer:  Same as always!

I confess I´m guilty!

Some parts in this chapter may seem familiar to you and I confess that I shamelessly stole from "Addam´s family" and "My big fat greek wedding", both wonderful movies! If you haven´t seen them yet, go and get them!!

However, the temptation was too great…

But read for yourself!

PS:  all reviews submitted on the first and second of august seem to be lost…I wasn´t able to read them and therefore I apologize if I don´t respond to any question asked in them!

**

Two days later, on an airport somewhere in Germany…

"Here we are!" Felice beamed as they as they descended the gangway.

"Welcome to my home country!"

She was relieved, in fact very relieved that they had left the whole disaster behind them.

If only for a while.

**

*Flashback*

Felice was busy packing her suitcase.

The Twins were out in town to buy some last things they needed for the journey.

Just as she had her hands full of bras to decide which ones she would take with her, the doorbell rang.

Cursing under her breath, she went to the door still having some bras hanging over her lower left arm.

She opened the door and sighed inwardly.

Great!

Just great!

Standing in front of her door was the last person she wanted to see at the moment.

It was Tom, of course.

He smiled his best boy group smile and offered her a big bunch of flowers.

Tulips.

Her favourite. How did he know that?

"Oh hi Tom, what are you doing here?"She asked suspiciously.

"I was in the neighbourhood by chance. Then I remembered that I always wanted to visit you and tadaah!! Here I am!"

He lowered his head till he was eye to eye with her.

"Are you feeling better now? You left in a pretty hurry yesterday!"

Felice noticed old Mrs Wilson peeking through her door.

"Well, come in! But I really don't have any time at the moment!" she mentioned for him to get inside.

He stepped in and she closed the door.

"So this is your noble home? Pretty, really. Almost cosy!" he grinned.

Then he gave the flowers to her.

"Did I interrupt you at something special?" he winked and pointed at the bras on her arm.

Felice blushed.

Damn!

Hastily she threw them into the opened bedroom and closed the door.

"I was just packing my suitcase as you arrived. We're leaving tomorrow!"

"We?" he asked innocently.

Bastard!

"Yes, my husband and I." 

They reached the living room. 

"Is he there? I'm curious to meet him!" Tom said eagerly and eyed his surroundings as if Felices husband hid behind the plants.

"No he isn't. He went shopping this morning."

Tom raised an eyebrow in faked surprise.

She put the flowers into a vase and desperately thought about a way to get rid of him before the Twins returned.

If they reacted as overly jealous as he merely shook her hand in the public, what would they do if they spotted them inside their own house?

She didn't want to know!

"What about lunch?" he asked now.

"I know a wonderful small Italian restaurant just two streets away!" There was the boy group smile again.

"Thank you, but I'm really _very_ busy right now!" she said.

"Are you sure? They make delicious lasagne!" he tried to persuade her.

"As I said I'm-

Felice stopped mid-speaking as she heard the sound of a key unlocking the front door.

Oh shit!

The Twins had returned.

"What's up?" Tom asked puzzled.

"That's my husband! Quick!" Felice grabbed his shoulder hard and yanked Tom into the bedroom where she looked for a place to hide.

His eyes grew big at the sight of her king-sized futon bed, adorned with big silver and black silk cushions (their first investment after the Twins had moved in)

"But Felice-

"Shhhh, keep quiet! He mustn't see you!" she hissed and opened her wardrobe.

"Why? I didn't-

"He's extremely jealous and I don't want….ehem…you to be hurt!" she lied and pushed the brown haired man into her wardrobe.

"Stay here until I fetch you! And don't make a sound!"

Tom just grinned excited.

Getting him out of the apartment hadn't been the easiest task…

She had tried to act as usual as she had greeted One and Two but the Twins always had been good observers and, of course, noticed that something was not as it should be. As they finally returned to their different occupations (Two selecting the cooking books he wanted to take with him and One starting a last attempt to build his clothes tree) she smuggled Tom out of the wardrobe into the bathroom and from there out of the window back on the street.

Really excellent!

If he former thought that her husband was just the product of her fantasy then he had now to think that she was married to a criminal abomination…

*End flashback*

**

"Whoa, now that's what I call a limousine!" One said approvingly as they left the airport and searched the parking garage for the car Felices parents had promised to send them. They had fetched the keys for it at the info point together with a letter from Felices mother which said that dinner would be served at 13.00 and that they better shouldn't be late.

One stowed away their luggage.

Two attempted to open the driver's door.

"No chance, my dear! I'm driving!!" Felice said sternly and snatched the key out of Two's hands.

Two pouted.

"Awww, is poor Twoey not allowed to drive pretty expensive car??" One teased.

Two grumbled under his breath.

Felice pointed with a finger on One´s chest.

"And you'll get onto the backseat!"

Two smirked.

"Is the car not a little big for just three persons?" Two asked curiously as they drove through the woods.

"Well, it's not exactly for three persons….it's for seven!" Felice stammered, eyes fixed on the street in front of them.

"Seven?" Two and One asked at exactly the same moment.

Felice ducked over the steering wheel.

Two furrowed his brow.

"Do we have to pick up some more guests? Who?" he asked.

"Yes, who?" One asked from the backseat.

"Oh just Neotrinitymorpheusandniobe…"

Silence.

"WHAT???" thundered Two.

"You invited those stinking, mediocre, irritating stupid rebels? Are you sick, wife??"

"I'm glad that you're taking this so easy!" Felice decided to change tactics and smirked.

"How could you?" 

"Neo needs help; he badly needs a holiday to get to his senses again! That's why!"

"But, but-

"See it as some sort of a revival! Hey, that's going to be fun! Don't worry!" she beamed.

"We're doomed, I just know it!" One said resigned.

**

They stopped at a small pay phone in the middle of nowhere and waited.

Punctually at high noon the pay phone started shaking and rumbling. Then the door sprang open and a small cloud of grey fog emerged.

Very dramatic.

Finally, a throng of arms and legs rolled out of it.

A cursing and twitching throng of arms and legs.

"Ouch! Pay attention, will you?!"

"That was my butt, stay away from it!"

"We've got a special offer this week young Miss, an accident insurance!"

"Morpheus, I'm hungry!!"

Felice jumped out of the car and helped Trinity to her feet. Her friend's hair was tousled and her face flushed.

Neo adjusted his mouse grey tie and looked paralyzed.

A high pregnant Niobe with an immense big baby belly tapped her foot impatiently on the ground and looked at a stressed looking Morpheus who carried two suitcases, a beauty box, a straw hat with a big red bow on it and an umbrella. Sweat trickled down his nose.

Felice who had embraced Trinity, let go off her and greeted Morpheus and Niobe. 

"Felice, we're very gratefully for this generous invitation! The doctor said that Niobe needs fresh air now!" Morpheus said.

"The pregnancy made her that moody that they were about to throw her out as your offer came!" Trinity whispered in her ear.

"It was possible for her to increase her usually moodiness? Wow, I'm truly impressed!" Felice whispered back and then stepped forward to embrace Niobe.

The Twins finally condescended their selves to get out of the car and watch the scenario out of a safe distance.

"What is she pregnant with? A hippo?" One asked amazed as he eyed her belly.

Two just suppressed a smirk and then stepped forward to greet Neo.

"Ah, if that isn't the Chosen One, dear brother!"

"Nice tie!" One smirked and went to Neo´s left side while Two was standing on his right side.

"Do I know you?" Neo asked dryly.

"Oh come on, Neo! Are you trying to tell us that you don't remember our little adventures?" Two started to get impatient.

"My name is Teo, not Neo! I tried to explain that to these other strangers but they wouldn't listen to me!"

"Leave him alone!" suddenly Trinity stood next to them.

"He's ill!"

**

They needed whole twenty minutes to get them ready to leave.

Well, five minutes to stow the luggage away and fifteen minutes to get a very unmovable Niobe onto the backseat to be exactly.

At 12.30 they arrived at the family mansion.

Felices mother greeted them and suddenly they were surrounded by a very loud and messy cloud of people who embraced and kissed Felice on the cheeks.

Two tried to make out single faces in the crowd.

There were older women and a whole bunch of younger men and women, part of them with the familiar black hair and pale complexion he knew from Felice and her mother and the other part with light blonde locks and sky blue eyes. That had to be her cousins then, he mused.

The crowd got silent and the attention suddenly moved from Felice to the Twins as her mother introduced them as her husbands.

"Oh no!" Two managed to groan and shot his equally shocked Twin a terrified glance. 

Then the wave of flesh hit them with blunt force. 

"Oh what handsome men!"

"Welcome, welcome!!"

"And I said to Uncle Jens that no one ever believed that she would marry! No one!!"

"Just like her mother; why be satisfied with one if you can have two for the same price?"

Two tried to bear the torture and at the same time to suppress the urge to run amok and kill everybody in reach.

He had lipstick on his cheeks.

Someone roughly tucked at his dreadlocks.

Strange people embraced him and held him tight.

Then someone poked him in the ass.

He whirled around, expecting to see one of the younger women who had fluttered their eye lashes at him and One. 

Instead he looked straight into the eyes of an ancient wrinkly little woman who grinned at him mischievously and uncovered a toothless mouth. 

Holy shit!

Just as he thought that he couldn't stand it any longer, Felice pushed herself through the crowd, hissing something in German he couldn't quite understand and shooed the people away from them.

"Grandma!" she hissed at the old woman in her wheelchair.

"How could you! What shall grandpa think of you if he hears about that?"

"Grandma" just snickered and rolled away.

Some minutes later, they found themselves in an exquisite suite all held in dark red, unpacking their suitcases.

Felice had been dragged away from some giggling female cousins and One had announced that he needed a shower.

Badly.

He felt sticky from all the grabbing and poking and kissing.

Just as Two opened his suitcase there was a knock on the door.

Silently cursing, he opened the door.

It was the ice queen, Felices mother.

"Are you comfortable with your rooms?" she asked and floated in.

"Yes, they´re exquisite!" Two said.

"I normally would have given you the white suite but we´re going to have another wedding here in a few days.."

She spotted the open suitcase on the bed.

"You are unpacking? Let me help!" she said.

Two suddenly felt very uncomfortable.

"This really isn't necessary!" Two said but it was already too late.

"A snap blade?" she said.

Two grabbed it out of her hands and threw the offending item into a nearby chest of drawers.

"A grenade?"

Now sweat trickled down his temples. He snatched the grenade out of her hands.

"A machine gun?" Felices mother asked puzzled and looked at him, holding the heavy gun in a manicured hand.

Two held his breath.

Then she smirked at him.

"Really Two, we do have enough of those at home! No need to bring your own!" she smiled and gave the gun to him.

He took it with a confused smile.

"Lunch will be served in fifteen minutes, don't be late!" she whispered and left the room.

Two let himself sink onto the mattress.

Now that had been a surprise.

He reached for a fresh shirt and stopped in the middle of his movement

How the hell did she know to tell them apart?

**

What is Neo´s mysterious illness?

Has Morpheus turned into a henpecked husband?

When will we see Felice and Trinity in dirndls?

Will grandma poke Two in the ass again?

And will we eventually see the Twins in Lederhosen *shudder* ?

Review, then I write more!!


	6. The competition doesn´t sleep!

Disclaimer: I don't own the Matrix.

A short note for all who are interested:

You can see fan art from me and other artists to "No woman, no cry" on www.the-rayments.de.vu !!

A cookie for each of you who can guess which drawings are done by me ;-)

**

With a sigh Felice returned to their suite to change clothes for lunch.

She almost had forgotten how tiring her family could be. Right now, she had gotten into a cross-examination from some younger cousins who absolutely wanted to know how she was able to tell her husbands apart (*nudge nudge wink wink giggle*).

"Is there a specific…difference??" had been the most harmless question of all.

She would need a club to keep them away from the Twins.

A BIG club.

With rusty nails on it.

Just to be sure.

She went into the bedroom and found Two in front of the mirror, buttoning up his shirt.

She managed a weak "Hi", slumped herself on the bed and closed her eyes.

Hearing the familiar sound of Two binding his tie, she tried to relax. Indeed the sound of silk gliding over silk, smooth white skin and knuckles was very pleasant and a routine she had learned to love. Every morning and every evening. Every day.

It had become an act of intimacy.

And she was the only one whom they allowed to participate in it.

In a passive way of course.

She sucked at binding ties.

Suddenly something wet hit her nose and she squealed in surprise.

As she opened her eyes and wiped her nose with the back of her hands she saw One towering over her, who had just returned out of the shower.

He wore only a towel round his waist (and his sunglasses of course) and his dreadlocks continued dripping water droplets on her.

With a protesting scream she grabbed for his towel and yanked him down on the bed where they engaged in a little catfight.

"Ahem!!" Two cleared his throat.

Felice came to a halt on top of One's chest and looked at Two.

Two shook his head disapprovingly while buttoning up his vest.

"We have another five minutes till lunch left. I suggest that you stop fooling around now and get ready!"

Felice looked innocently at One, who returned her gaze equally innocently.

Just as Two was about to turn around for his coat, she leaped at him and dragged him onto the bed.

"Group hug!!" One announced happily.

"Aaarghh!!"

**

"I could swear that this is already her third dish!" One mumbled fascinated into Felices ear and gestured in Niobes direction.

"Well, don't forget that she needs to eat for two!" Felice mumbled back and shifted her attention towards Two.

Poor Two examined the contents on his dish suspiciously.

"What's this?" he asked and poked his fork into a yellow vegetable-like substance.

"That's Sauerkraut, my dear! Very healthy for you! Give it a try!" she tried to cheer him up.

He raised an eyebrow.

"Are you sure?"

"Give it a try; you like the roast don't you? Then you should like Sauerkraut!"

On her left side, One was busy gobbling up everything her Aunt Christina happily piled onto his dish.

The others seemed to enjoy their meal too.

Good.

That meant she could finally turn her attention towards her younger cousins who tried to make eye contact to the Twins during the meal.

Maria, Anita and Julia.

Tall, blonde, blue-eyed and big bosomed.

In one word:

Every man's wet dream.

Irresistible.

Although they weren't able to tell One and Two apart, they had quickly discovered that the man at Felices left side was the one to flirt with while the one on her right side was the reserved one.

(That wasn't that true, Two could be very…convincing…if he finally decided to switch his charm on. But they didn't have to know that, did they?)

Felice suddenly felt too ugly, too cumbersome, too pale and too old.

She shot the three of them an angry look.

It didn't seem to impress them much, though.

They only started giggling.

Fortunately Two was still examining his food and One was busy eating while listening to Aunt Christina babbling how much she admired a "healthy appetite".

Trinity glanced understandingly at her while Neo still tried to persuade her into buying insurance.

Her cousins had eyed him too, but decided that the Twins were much more interesting prey.

And forbidden fruits, because they were married.

Which seemed to make them even more attractive to them.

They didn't dare to even look at Morpheus though.

One single look at a fuming Niobe told them better not to mess with her.

Felice decided to ask her to teach that particular look to her.

Trinity and she secretly called it "Niobes trademark death stare".

She made eye contact with her mother. Despite all the rumours and all the differences they had their things in common.

Wordless communication, for example.

One look from her and Annalena Guildenstern instantly knew what was disturbing her one and only daughter.

She sent Maria and Anita to the kitchens to prepare the dessert.

And to Felices delight she ordered Julia to help Grandma eating her Sauerkraut, one of the most hated occupations for the younger generation because Grandma used to drool during eating and that made her food pass out over every person that had the luck to sit next to her.

Awww, poor Julia!

Felice smirked merciless as her dear cousin got smeared with Sauerkraut and mashed potatoes all over her ultra mini dress.

She glanced thankfully at her mother.

Annalena Guildenstern just smiled.

** 

It turned out that Niobe got very sick after her fourth and final portion, so Felice and Trinity had to accompany her to the bathroom.

"Bleeeraachkrcchhhhh" it came out of the toilet cabin.

"Poor Niobe!" Trinity said as she stood in front of the mirror and fixed her hair.

"Uargghhhkillkghjk"

"Thousand good reasons not to get pregnant and there they are!" Felice said and applied some more lipstick.

"Argllkghghrllchblaeachhhh"

"God knows you're right!" Trinity agreed.

"So you guys are my little cousin's husbands? I'm Jürgen!" a tall black-haired man said and crushed One's hand in a tight body builder like grip.

"Yes we are! One and Two, nice to meet you!" Two said and kicked his twin discreetly in the shin just as One was about to kick the man for good.

Jürgen smiled and introduced a second man, this time a smaller, blonde one.

"This is Klaus, my brother!" he ruffled the younger man's hair.

One shot Two a puzzled look.

How could brothers look _that_ different? 

"You have to know.." interrupted Jürgen the Twins thoughts.

"That my little brother here is going to marry at the end of the week!"

Klaus smiled shyly. The Twins obviously gave him the creeps.

"Well… our congratulations!" Two said suspiciously. 

He couldn't think of a way this conversation would be going.

He was confused. Jürgen clearly expected a special reaction from them but which?

Humans!

"And since you are now belonging to our family we wanted to invite you to his bachelor-parting party!"

Now both of them smiled.

"A party?" One asked interested.

Since they had left the Merovingian, there hadn't been any chances for some parties where only men would be to do whatever men would do if they were amongst them selves.

Then one of the older women called for Klaus and he had to leave.

Jürgen grinned conspiratingly.

"And well…as it seems that you'll be the only married men who will be there…would you do us the favour and initiate poor Klaus to the duties and the rights of a husband?" he nudged One in the rips and winked.

The Twins just gaped at him.

"I take this as a yes then! I'll pick you up at 7.30 tomorrow evening!" Jürgen said and vanished in the crowd.

**

I know this is a short one but I just returned from a camping weekend and my brain is fried.

Really.

It's awfully hot in Germany at the moment…

To give you something to think about:

What will happen on that bachelor party?

And which advises will the Twins give poor Klaus??

Will Felices cousins try to seduce One and Two?

And what will Felice do to stop them?

Will Niobe eat till she explodes?


	7. The cake incident

Disclaimer:  I don't own the Matrix and the song below belongs to Donna Summer!

**

„I wouldn't know what to tell her Mama, really! " Felice said to her mother.

"Look Schatz, Sandra always was a….shy person. Innocent in a way just few girls are today. She needs someone to talk to, someone who takes away her fear of the marriage!" her mother said intently.

"Her fear of marriage?" 

Annalena Guildenstern shook her head.

"The wedding night!" she explained.

"Oh."

"And I think she would appreciate it more if someone her own generation would talk to her! Why don't you take Niobe and Trinity with you as well? That could be helpful!"

Felice thought of Niobe and her moods and pitied the poor girl. Niobe surely would scare her for good.

"And after you have talked to her you'll have a nice evening! I'll take care of everything!"

Felice sighed in defeat.

Two cursed.

He was lost.

Again.

Damn that big house with the countless floors, corridors and rooms which all looked the same!

He had tried to find the nearest bathroom next to the dining hall and now he wandered aimlessly through the house.

And he had no clue where exactly he was.

He furrowed his brow and looked out of a nearby window. He could see woods. Wonderful! The mansion was surrounded by woods at three of four sides.

Two propped his elbows on the window sill and tried to concentrate.

He didn't want to contact One, because he was sure that his twin would tease him merciless if he found out that he got lost.

Again.

And Felice seemed to be deep in conversation because she didn't respond to his telepathic "knock".

*Squeekasqueekasqueeka*

His head snapped up.

Then something heavy and metallic hit his heels.

"Tehehheeehhee" someone giggled.

He turned around warily.

It was grandma in her wheelchair.

The ancient little woman smiled that toothless smile he had learned to fear again.

He tried to back away.

Damn!

He was cornered between the wheelchair and the window sill.

There were only two options:

Phase

Or jump out of the window.

Well, he couldn't phase because the old lady would likely get a heart attack if he did so and he was sure that Felice wouldn't appreciate that.

And jump out of the window….

"Get a little bit nearer my son, I want to see your face and my eyes are not that good any more!" she cackled.

Now cold sweat began to trickle down his back and drench his fresh shirt.

Slowly, very slowly he bent down till he was eye to eye with grandma. That woman really had to be ancient! The wrinkles in her face reminded him of that Asian dog race which name he already had forgotten. Two grey eyes sparkled mischievously and the thin hands clawed into the brown camel's hair cover on her lap. White-grey hair on her head was fixed in a cement hart knot.

"Oh my, what a pretty boy you are! But you should get out more often, you're too pale!"

Suddenly one of the claw like hands shot out and grasped the flesh of his left cheek in a surprisingly strong grip.

And tugged at it.

Hard.

Till his teeth chattered.

And suddenly jumping out of the window seemed a good idea…

"Grandma!! Let go off him, now!!"

His cheek was released and Two resisted the urge to slump onto his knees and whimper like a frightened child.

Felice rolled her grandmother back into her room and then carefully took Two's hand and guided him back into their suite. On the way she picked up a shocked and confused looking One who immediately grasped her other hand and refused to let go off it till they arrived at their rooms.

She left them on the couch and searched the bar for something alcoholic.

It took three big glasses of cognac to calm them down a bit.

**

Later in the evening…

"And the surprise as I found out that I was pregnant!" Niobe waved her hands dramatically through the air.

Poor Sandra clutched her pillow tighter.

"I had to vomit every morning, before breakfast. And after breakfast. And after lunch, of course!"

Sandra's eyes grew bigger every minute.

"That isn't going as planned!" Trinity hissed to Felice who opened another bottle of champagne.

"And then the pain in my back! Each time I get up it's like a chain saw that cuts through my spine!"

"What a pity that Niobe isn't allowed to drink alcohol at the moment…" she glanced at the bottle and smiled.

"But we still can try to fill Sandra up a little bit!" she smiled devilishly.

"And here we are!" Jürgen said to the Twins as they entered the bar he had chosen for the bachelor parting party.

Two raised his eyebrows. Well, the establishment looked a bit…rustic. Heavy oaken furniture and a lot of dead animal's heads on the walls. Red-white checked tablecloths and oil paintings with hunting scenes.

Disgusting.

And definitely not the kind of bar where the beautiful people went.

He sighed.

Next to him One first shook his head in disgust then his glance got stiff and he started sweating.

Two looked at his twin puzzled and followed his gaze. It was directed at Jürgen who approached them with a bundle of clothes in his arms.

"Here guys, take off your coats and your shirts! Tonight we're all wearing this!" he gave a set of t-shirts and hats to them.

"You're joking!" One started a last attempt to avoid the dawning disaster.

Jürgen´s gaze became stern.

"That's tradition! Don't start complaining, just get over there and put it on!!"

Two sighed defeated and grabbed the offending items out of his arms.

Muttering and cursing, One and Two entered the men's room and changed into their "traditional party clothes" as Jürgen had titled them.

"Oh no! I'm so not wearing this! Have you seen the picture on the shirt?" One complained out of his toilet cabin.

Silence.

Then two white coats were flipped over the door frame at the exactly same moment.

"I'm seriously hoping that we don't see any old acquaintances this night!" Two mumbled.

Two vests landed on the coats.

"That's embarrassing, really!" One complained.

Two simply sulked in his cabin.

Then two ties flew over the cabin's door followed from two light-grey expensive looking shirts.

A minute later both doors opened and the Twins stepped out and looked at their reflections in the mirror over the sink.

One sighed.

"We are getting aggravated…"

"Yes, we are!" Two agreed.

**

Felice (using a banana as microphone and wearing a pink plastic girlie shirt written "Diva" in red glitter on the chest):

"Sittin´ here eatin´ my heart out waitin´

 waitin´ for some lover to call

 dialled about a thousands numbers lately

 almost range the phone off the wall!" 

Felice, Trinity and Sandra (after the fourth bottle of champagne, jumping on Sandra's bed):

"Looking for some hot stuff baby this evenin´ 

 I need some hot stuff baby tonight

 I need hot stuff

 I want some hot stuff

 I need hot stuff

 Hot, hot, hot, hot stuff

 Hot, hot, hot

 Hot, hot, hot, hot stuff

 Hot, hot, hot

Trinity (wearing a blonde wig and some of Felices stilettos):

"How´s that hot stuff baby this evenin´

 I need some hot stuff baby tonight

 Gimme little hot stuff baby this evenin´

 Hot stuff baaaaaby got to I need your love tonight

 I need hot stuff

 Looking for hot stuff

 I want some hot stuff!"

Niobe (sitting on a chair, totally sober and looking terribly bored):

"Aaaarggghh!!"

Sandra (wearing a French chamber maid's costume with fish net stockings):

"Sittin´ here eatin´ my heart out

 no reason

 Won´t spend another night on my own

 I dialled about a thousand numbers baaaaaaby

 I'm bound to find somebody home!"

All three (now almost hysterically):

"Gotta have some hot stuff baby this evenin´

 I need some hot stuff baby tonight

 Looking´ for some hot stuff baby this evenin´

 I need your love baby

 Don't need your love tonight

 Hot stuff

 Baby this evenin´

 I need hot stuff baby tonight

 Yes, yes, yes now hot stuff baby 

 I need your hot stuff baby tonight

 I want some hot stuff baby this evenin´

 Hot stuff baaaaaby

 Got to I need your looooooooove tonight!!!"

Then they slumped totally exhausted onto the now slightly ruined bed.

"That was fun!" Sandra beamed.

Trinity plugged the wig off her head and grabbed for the last bottle of champagne.

They relaxed a few minutes in silence.

"You know, that's not fair!" Sandra suddenly complained after another sip.

"What?" Felice asked.

"The men get a party out in town and we are stuck in the house! Unfair!" she pouted.

Trinity hiccupped and squinted at Felice.

"She's got a point there, you know!"

Felice giggled.

"You're just stupid!"

"Huh?" Sandra said.

"Well, if we want to go out, why don't we simply do it?"

**

"Why do I always get pursued into things like that?" Niobe muttered as they drove into the nearest city.

"Because you're the only one left of us who is not drunk yet!" Trinity smirked.

They had changed in a more…suitable outfit for serious partying, which meant that they all (with exception of Niobe of course) now wore mini dresses all over embroidered with sequins. Trinity's was, of course, black. Sandra's was red and Felices was silver. Niobe had forced her belly in black loose silk.

"Okay, where do you want to go?" Niobe asked irritabled.

Felice pondered various clubs and bars.

"There's a pretty cool night club just two streets away! Turn the next left!" she ordered her friend.

"Hey, wait a minute! That's Klaus car over there!" Sandra suddenly screamed and pointed at a small blue car. 

Niobe stopped and they all craned their necks.

Out of the open doors of the bar came shouting and party noise.

"And there's Jürgen´s car too!" Felice pointed out.

"Seems we found their party!" Trinity said.

Silence.

"Felice?" Sandra asked shyly.

"Yes?"

"Would it be okay…I mean it couldn't possibly hurt if we…go in and risk a quick glance?"

"You're curious, aren't you?" Trinity teased her.

Felice, who suddenly remembered that the Twins were in there as well, snickered.

"I wouldn't know what could be so bad about it! But don't get angry if they got a stripper in there!" 

"A stripper?? No way, Klaus wouldn't do that!" Sandra defended her fiancée.

"Oh Klaus probably not, but Jürgen would!"

"Another good reason to take a look!" Trinity said resolutely and opened the car's door.

"Are you enjoying yourselves my friends?" Jürgen asked and offered them another schnapps.

Doppelkorn, One reminded himself as he gulped the clear liquid in one swig like Jürgen had told them to.

After a first uncomfortable hour they had found themselves pretty quick engaged in several drinking games and tests of courage. All guests had sort of bathed in Doppelkorn and beer and after that hour they didn't feel uncomfortable in their "party clothes" any more.

One was smug because he had won a drinking contest against the landlord himself (the joys of being a program, ah yes!).

And Two was delighted because he finally succeeded in getting the recipe for roast with sauerkraut (he planned to cook it for Felice if they returned home to prevent homesickness).

All in one:

It promised to become a nice evening.

"Are you ready for the big show down then?" Jürgen asked and pointed at the kitchen doors.

A few moments later the doors opened and an enormous cake was rolled in by two waiters.

One raised an eye brow and looked at his Twin. The party was fine so far, but lacked one thing:

Girls.

The cake was placed in the middle of the room and Jürgen mentioned for a slightly drunken Klaus to step forward.

Jürgen´s following little speech ended with a dramatically "Tadaaaahh!!" and out of the cake jumped a really sparsely clothed young woman.

Two blinked and took a second, closer look.

Blonde, wavy hair. With two pink bunny ears attached to it.

Blue eyes.

And that pout on her lips…

It was Julia.

And she was looking at him.

**

"Can you see him?" Trinity asked as they shoved themselves through the incredible noisy crowd.

"Not yet!" Felice answered and tried to calm Niobe down who just attempted to kick one of the drunken men right between the legs.

Then suddenly applause, cheering and wolf whistling could be heard and music kicked in.

That kind of music one would expect in a cheap porn movie.

Sandra's gaze turned determined and she pushed the people who were blocking her way to the sides. Felice, Niobe and Trinity followed in her wake.

More wolf whistling and a bra flew through the air.

Then the crowd in front of them parted and they could see….

At the first moment Felice didn't want to believe her eyes.

Her friends next to her gasped.

There, on the first table sat One and Two, _her husbands_. They didn't wear their coats anymore, but instead white t-shirts with a naked woman printed on them. And at the place where her genital area should be was a patch of black fur attached. They also wore folkloric green felt hats with chamois beards on them.

But that wasn't exactly what troubled Felice.

It was the fact that her beloved cousin Julia sat on One's lap, her legs spread on Two's. both of them had lipstick on their faces. 

Julia only wore her underpants and was about to push One's face right between her breasts. 

That beast turned her head and looked Felice in the eye.

And she smirked.

The crowd suddenly got very silent.

Two finally spotted her and had the decency to blush deep pink.

Jürgen appeared out of nowhere and tried to approach her while Felices stomach first did somersaults and then decided to complain about the five bottles champagne they had emptied together.

She snatched the car keys out of Niobes numb hands and fled the bar.

**

Ohoh, Cliffhanger….

Review and I might release you from your curiosity  *evil smirk*

And for those of you who wondered why Neo and Morpheus weren't at the party…well, they don't belong to the family, do they?

But don't worry, I didn't forget them ;-)


	8. Scream!

Disclaimer: Matrix not mine!

The second half of this chapter was highly inspirated by Marilyn Manson´s new album I´m listening at the moment, hehehe…

**

„Interest rate, I have to calculate the interest rate….and the insurance premium…damn!!" Neo/Teo growled and rummaged through various suitcases which belonged to the strange woman, Trinity, who he shared his room with.

"There has to be some paper somewhere and a pencil!" he growled again and opened a small black leather bag.

Oooops, that was a beauty case. 

Just as he was about to put the offending item away (Teo Landerson _never ever would disturb a woman's privacy!), something awful familiar hit his eye._

Without further thoughts he pulled the thing out of its case and weighted it in his hands. What the hell was that? And why did he feel that it had to be something important? It felt smooth and cold in his hands. Teo sat down on his bed and propped his chin in one hand while eyeing the object and trying to remember.

**

"We didn't expect that she would react…like this!" One said, his voice clearly expressing both confusion and frustration.

"No, we didn't!" Two agreed and steered the VW beetle they had without hesitation confiscated from Jürgen onto the city's main street.

"Can you sense her?" Two asked his twin worried.

One closed his eyes and looked terribly concentrated. After a minute he let out a frustrated sigh.

"She doesn't let me in, I fear that she does not want to be found!"

"Excellent, really excellent!!" Two grumbled.

It was going to be a long night!

**

Felice cursed as she drove through the city.

Men all were chauvinistic pigs!

She snorted.

The irony!!

Off all One and Two, who wanted to murder every man who only dared to look at her, her husbands those prime examples of fidelity…

Aaargh!

The wind tousled her hair as she steered the small cabriolet round a corner, into the darker parts of the city and away from the bar where her cousin Julia…

No she couldn't think about that right now!

She needed a drink and a distraction.

At the corners of her mind she felt a light tugging. It was One, looking for her location. Angrily she closed the connection and shut him out.

Served him right!

She parked her car and entered another pub where she seated herself at the bar and ordered Southern Comfort with Coke.

Felice sighed and took the first sip of her drink, and then she settled for watching soccer on TV, like most of the guests.

Gradually she calmed down a bit.

And just as she was about to order her second drink, some one tapped her on the shoulder.

"Feli, Sweetheart! What a nice surprise!"

She turned around and looked straight into a pair of familiar brown eyes.

**

Neo woke up out of his trance and blinked.

Where was he?

And why was he wearing a suit?

He eyed his surroundings. A bedroom. And the bags and suitcases belonged to Trinity. But where was she? And everyone else?

He blinked again.

Then he noticed that he clutched something in his right hand.

Neo clearly was confused.

Why was he here, sitting on a foreign bed, wearing an uncomfortable suit and for god's sake….holding Trinity's lady shaver in his hands??

He got up to find Morpheus.

**

In the meantime Felice and Tom had switched from Southern Comfort to Tequila.

"Okay, lemme repeat thiss…you´vve found your hussband chheating on ya…right?" Tom said his tongue already heavy from the alcohol.

"Rrright!! That bastard!" Felice hiccupped and reached for the salt.

Tom laid an arm around her shoulder.

"I…always knew him wassnn´t the rightoneforyousweetheartiam!"

"Bastard!!" Felice sniffed and reached for the bottle.

"But now…don´ttt worry Cherie, I'm gonna beathimintoabloodypulpthatasshole…"

"Bastard!!" Felice cursed. She felt herself sober up already.

Damn that virus powers! They hindered you to get drunk properly!

"Know what your prwoblem is Sweetie? You have toeliminatyourproblems…"

"What did you say??" Felice was suddenly wide awake.

Tom patted her back affectionately. Then he pulled himself together and looked at her with clear eyes.

"I said that you have to eliminate your problem. Visualize your target and then…eliminate it!" he aimed at one of the empty bottles and pretended to shoot it with his finger. Felice felt herself get tense. Eliminate the problem?

"Eliminate…"

"That's what I said Honey…look I can help you, you know…you could move into my apartment!"

She didn't listen anymore to his babbling.

"Eliminate?!"

"Of course it takes a while till a divorce…" 

Felice got up from her stool and grabbed her purse.

"Eliminate!! That's it!! Bye Tom, have to go, see you later!!" she said and stomped out of the little pub.

Who said that the Twins were her problem?

"Eliminate the target?" Felice thought grimly.

Run for your life Julia!!

**

Trinity and Niobe were standing in the entrance hall as Felice came home. They looked at her critically.

Felice smiled.

"Is everything alright with you?" Trinity asked cautiously.

"Sure…" Felice purred and took off her coat.

"Maria, please prepare one of the guest rooms for me!" she said to the maid who took her coat.

Niobe and Trinity shared a confused look.

"Ahem…Feli?" Niobe asked.

Felice raised her eyebrows. Niobe never called her "Feli".

"Yes?"

"You aren't going to commit terribly revenge, are you?"

"Me?? Of course not!" Felice still smiled innocently.

Silence.

"Are they home yet?" she finally asked.

"Noooo…look should we go up to my room and have a drink??" Trinity asked.

"No thank you, I think I'm going to bed now! Good night!" and with that she left.

"I have a bad feeling about that…" Niobe confessed.

"Me too!"

**

Felice took a hot bubble bath and tried to relax. Then she changed into her pyjama and switched the TV on.

Half an hour later she heard a door squeaking.

Felice turned the TV off and tiptoed to the door.

She saw that it was Julia as she peeked through the keyhole.

Perfect!

She waited another few minutes to be safe and left her room. Then she sneaked into the attic. That had been her secret place as child. Everything that wasn't needed anymore was stowed away there.

A paradise for a child with an active imagination!

She didn't switch on the light. Too risky!

Felice tiptoed around till she found what she was looking for.

The trunk with the carnival costumes!

She rummaged through it and pulled out what she needed.

A long, grey-white tattered ghost costume.

And chains.

Lots of rusty old chains.

She changed into the costume and adorned her arms and legs with chains.

Then she winded a plastic snake around her neck.

She glanced at her reflection in the mirror.

Wonderful!

And now the masterpiece.

She phased.

Perfectly perfect.

And scary!

She smiled at her reflection.

Ah, those wonderful fangs!

And those red gleaming eyes!

If that wouldn't scare her to death….

**

Felice smirked and floated through the floor, silently humming the tune from Marilyn Manson's "Doll degga buzz zigety zag" which suited her current mood perfectly. Ah yes, perfectly perfect! She floated through the dark and empty corridor on the north side of the second floor where the rooms of her beloved cousins were, determined to play a little bit Poltergeists.

She reached Julia's door and listened intently for any sounds that indicated that her dear _beloved cousin was still awake._

Nothing.

She floated into the room.

There, huddled onto her bed Julia lay and snored slightly.

Felice grinned. Now how best to begin?

She looked up and almost screamed out.

Horrible!

Disgusting!

Scary!

Justin Timberlake!

Felice shuddered and floated through the window. From the outside, she pressed her face against the window, bared her fangs and opened her gleaming eyes as wide as possible. Then she scratched with half-solid fingernails over the window pane.

*Screeech*

Something stirred in the small bed.

*Screeeeech*

"Uaaaarrghhhh" she moaned experimentally and rattled with the chains.

Now a small and nervous looking figure sat up. Outside was full moon this night and Julia had her curtains closed. That meant she had to get up to see what was on the outside.

*Screeeeech*

Now she could hear the light sounds of cautious footsteps.

Then someone slowly, very slowly opened the curtain a hands breadth.

Felice opened her mouth for a quiet scream and pressed her face harder onto the glass. 

But only for a second till she was sure that the bitch really had seen her. But not long enough to recognize her face. Then she let herself quickly sink out of sight.

A small cry and some noises told her that the "target" had fled back to bed and pulled the covers over her head.

She waited five minutes and then floated back into Julia's room.

From throughout the floor right under her bed.

Felice smiled devilishly.

She grasped one of the bed's legs and shook it.

Hard.

The shivering and quivering bundle stopped moving. And apparently breathing too.

Silence.

Felice let out a long and scary sigh.

Mhh, sigh? What about breathing down her neck? But that could wait…

Finally two hands appeared on the edge of the bed and a tousled and sweating blonde curly head glanced frightened under the bed.

Up to that moment, Felice already had let herself sink through the floor, so that only her head with the serpent like hair could still be seen. 

She smiled at her terrified cousin and let out another scary moan. Then she let herself completely sink through the floor.

It was deadly silent for approximately ten seconds.

Then Julia's scream teared the silence away and woke up the whole floor.

"Heeelllllp!!!! There's…there´s…there's a ghost under my bed!!!" and some hysterically sobbing.

One floor beneath, Felice smiled as she heard the doors of several rooms open and the footsteps and the questions of confused and worried relatives.

She floated back to her room.

"Doll degga buzz buzz zigety zag, doll degga buzz buzz zigety zag….." she hummed.

She decided to do the same she had advised the Twins to do.

She would get herself a hobby.

It was called "Julia".

**

"Are you sure that she isn't planning something…evil?" Niobe asked worriedly.

"Felice? No, she wouldn't! Felice is and always was a very sensible person! She wouldn't dare…." Trinity defended her school time friend.

"Heeellllp!!! There's…there´s…there´s a ghost under my bed!" a scream interrupted Trinity's little speech.

Niobe gave her the "I've told you so"-look.

Trinity sighed.

"And it wants to eat me!!!"

**

Will Neo really recover?

And will the lady shaver of doom appear again?

Do the Twins still wear their riddiculous "party outfits" while driving through the city and searching Felice?

And will Felice ever forgive them?

Will Julia die of a heart attack?

Or will she go insane?

Will Tom give up the love of his life that easily?

And where the hell does he come from that suddenly?

Will Morpheus ever return out of his plot hole?

And will we see him be bullied around by Niobe?

Who wants to see the girls in dirndls at Sandra´s wedding?

Hold up your hands (aka leave a review!) and I promise, I´ll do my very best!


	9. The pen pusher

Disclaimer: I don't own the Matrix! If I would, I wouldn't spend my time writing this…

                 In fact, I would be in bed and let me get massaged from One while Two would feed me grapes, hehehe….;-)

**

„There you are, you're late! Where have you been?" Trinity scolded as the Twins finally returned to the mansion in the late morning.

Two opened his mouth for a sharp reply.

"Nah, I don't really want to know! Get over there to the other men and get dressed! The wedding starts in about three hours, so hurry up!" she said and pushed them both towards one of the many rooms. One looked confused at his twin. Everywhere people ran around like mad chickens, carrying flowers or other useless stuff and spreading hectic.

Two reached out and managed to grab Trinity's sleeve before she could vanish in the crowd.

"Where's Felice?"

Trinity huffed.

"She's upstairs and tries to calm Sandra down. The poor girl is hysteric and that's totally your fault!"

"Our fault?? That's not true!" One protested.

Trinity glared at him.

"Oh yes it is! She thinks now….never mind, you wouldn't understand anyway! And now….GET DRESSED!!!" she stormed away.

One looked at Two and shrugged. Women!

Then someone behind them cleared his throat. The Twins turned around and looked at one of the many chamber maids. This one seemed about forty years and was very sturdy. She carried a large paper box.

"You are the brothers Jumeaux? Here are your clothes." She handed them the box.

"Clothes?" One asked puzzled. There outfit surely was predestined for a wedding, after all they had worn it at their _own _wedding!

"We don't need any other clothes, thank you very much!" Two said and shoved the box back into her chubby hands.

The maid's expression grew stern.

"Excuse me sirs, but I've been ordered to take care that you get these clothes!" she punched the box into One's stomach, causing him to bend over and gasp for air.

Two and the maid now engaged into a staring contest while One tried to regain his dignity.

Two took a deep breath.

"We…don't….need…any…clothes…thank…you!" he hissed, grabbed the box out of his twin's hands and shoved it into the maid's arms.

Now the maid's bonnet started to tremble violently.

"But…I…was…ordered…to…give…it…to…you!" she hissed back and shoved the box now into Two's stomach, causing him to double over in lack of oxygen. Gods, that woman had strength in her arms!

"We…don't…want…them!"

"That…doesn't…matter! The…mistress…ordered…me!"

The box was thrown back and forth.

A small crowd gathered around them.

"NO!"

"YES!"

"NO!"

"YES!"

Finally Two sighed and threw his arms up in the air.

"WHY???"

The maid grinned triumphantly.

"Because it is a folkloric wedding!!" with that she threw the box to the Twin's feet and left.

One looked at a very disturbed Two.

"Oh shit!"

**

"I'm feeling special!" Trinity beamed as she put on one of the bridesmaid's dresses.

"Oh stop it, will you?" Felice said in a bad mood. 

Out of sympathy for her soon to be cousin-in-law Sandra had decided to fire her original bridesmaids Julia, Maria and Anita and to replace them with Felice, Trinity and Niobe. 

The bride herself had locked herself in her bathroom and refused to leave it since the early morning.

"I'm looking like a balloon!" Niobe complained as she forced her body into the dirndl that was tailored for Anita's size.

Felice sighed and eyed her reflection in the mirror.

The dirndls they were wearing were made out of red linen. They had a white apron around the waist, a white petticoat and a low neckline with a bodice to lace. But the most terrible thing of all, Felice thought, were the short bulging sleeves. A short telepathic knock told her that the Twins had returned. She shut the connection down again. She had already enough problems to solve at the moment, first off all to get the bride out of the bathroom, then to examine with her husbands now.

While Trinity spinned in front of the mirror and Niobe grumbled something about anorectic chicks, Felice kneeled down in front of the bathroom door and knocked lightly.

"Go away!" Sandra sniffed.

"You know Sweetie; you have to come out of there sometime!" The bathroom had no window.

"I don't want to!"

Felice peeked through the keyhole. Sandra sat on the edge of the bathing tub and wept into a Kleenex.

"Please open the door, it's only us!" Trinity said and joined Felice on the carpet.

"I don't want to marry if all husbands are like this!" it came out of the bathroom.

"Get out of the way!" Niobe suddenly murmured and pushed them away from the door. She held a picklock in her hand.

Felice and Trinity got up and Niobe managed to open the door within seconds.

"Where did you learn that??" Trinity wanted to know.

Niobe grinned smugly.

"Morpheus sometimes tries to do the same…" she said cryptically and went back to put her stockings on.

Trinity and Felice then dragged a yelping and protesting Sandra out of her self made prison and seated her in front of the dresser.

"How much time is left?" Trinity asked worried.

Sandra's face was all red and puffy.

"Only one hour!" Niobe informed them. Felice grabbed her cosmetic kit and started applying make up on Sandra's face.

They spend a few minutes in silence, Sandra sniffing occasionally and Niobe cursing about the dress and the fact that she couldn't see her feet anymore.

"How can you stand it?" Sandra suddenly asked and looked at Felice.

"Huh?"

"I mean, how can you live with them, day by day, if they treat you like this?"

"They aren't always like this!" Trinity interrupted as she saw Felices face darken dangerously.

"Ha!" it came out of Niobes direction. Trinity shot her a warning look.

"I mean, isn't that what marriage is about? To spend the rest of your life with someone who adores you and fulfils your every wish? To know that your mate wouldn't never ever do something that would hurt you? Perfect harmony- "Sandra said but was interrupted.

"Ahem, I think we all got your point!" Trinity said hastily and shot her best friend a worried look.

Felice looked as if she was about to start snivelling too.

"Oh girl, get your head out of the clouds!" Niobe snapped.

"It's not all sunshine and happiness! There are bad times too. Times, when you just want to kick your beloved right to the moon and back! But that's only natural. And Felice has married very….rushed. They didn't know each other very well then. But I know that they love her dearly. There's really no reason to upset Felice just because _you _have last-minute panic!"

Felice and Trinity just gaped at Niobe. Sandra blushed deep red under her make-up and took Felices hand.

"I'm sorry!" she whispered.

Felice nodded and squeezed her hand.

"There's only one thing I want to know…" Sandra said as she put on her wedding dress.

Felice, Trinity and Niobe rolled her eyes.

"What?"

"Why did you marry both of them?"

"Ehhhhhmmmmm…." Felice started and looked help seeking at Trinity.

"That's tradition in their home land!" Trinity improvised.

"Tradition?" Sandra asked unbelievingly.

"Yeah…..if you fall in love with a man…..you…have to marry his twin too!" Niobe lied.

Felice leaned her head against the door frame and sighed.

Sandra stared in space for a good while.

"And where do they come from?" she finally asked.

Felice groaned.

"Oh, from far, far away. Really far away!"

**

Two looked at his really pissed off twin as he opened the box of Pandora in one of the men's rooms.

He scanned its contents and sighed. Then he grabbed the bundle on top and flung it at his brother who caught it with ease.

"We have to be traditional, wear this! (*)" he said to him and grabbed the second bundle.

With a suffering sigh both Twins entered their toilet cabins and started changing into their "wedding guest's clothes".

And once again they stood in front of a mirror and cursed quietly.

"I knew it was a bad idea to visit her family!" Two grumbled.

"Will she ever forgive us?" One asked sadly.

Just before Two could answer to that, they heard strange noises coming out of the rest room next door.

The Twins opened the door a hand's breadth and peeked through the opening.

And immediately wished they hadn't.

Right in the middle of the rest room Neo and Morpheus, already in their "wedding outfit" danced and sang some strange German sounding melody.

Neo:

"Hoch auf dem gelben Wagen, sitz ich beim Schwager vorn

 Vorwärts die Rosse traben, lustig schmettert das Horn!

Morpheus:

„Felder und Wiesen und Auen,

 Leuchtendes Ährengold."

Both:

„Ich möchte ja so gerne noch schauen, 

 aber der Wagen, der Waaaaaagen, der rollt!! Jodeldudeldijöööö!!"

Midst singing they had started clapping their hands on their tights and soles, jumping and spinning.

The Twins jaws dropped.

Literally.

Two finally opened the door and stepped in, followed from One, who preferred to stay behind his twin, just out of security measures, of course.

"What the hell are you doing there??" Two demanded to know.

Neo and Morpheus stopped dancing and yodelling and looked at the Twins.

And started laughing.

"Didn't I tell you? I knew there would come a day when we see them looking completely idiotic!!" Neo smirked.

"Albinos in lederhosen! Muahahahha!"

One chuckled evilly and smoothed his suspenders.

"You're not looking any better! And what did you do there?"

"That? Oh that was just a dance and a song that one of Felices cousins taught us yesterday, as you decided to screw up your marriage!" Neo snickered.

Two sighed. 

"I really liked him better as he still believed to be a pen pusher!"

One nodded.

"Oh yes, at least then we would now have a better life insurance then before!"

"With that special "assassin-bonus" he mentioned!"

"Aaargghhh!" Neo suddenly screamed and cowered down on the ground, making small whining noises and shielding his head with his arms.

The Twins gaped.

"You said it!" Morpheus accused Two with a glare that almost matched Niobes "trade-mark death stare".

Two sulked.

"What did I do _now_?" he asked.

"You said the evil word!"

"The evil word? What? Did you mean "pen pusher"?"

"Aaaarrrrgggg!!!"

"Don't say it, don't say it!" Morpheus scolded and knelt down beside his friend who started shaking and twitching.

And drooling.

Two snickered evilly.

"Did you see this, dear brother? It seems the Chosen One does not like the word "pen pusher"!!"

"Arrggghjlpkölllll"

"Really? He does not like the word "pen pusher"? What happens if I say…..PENPUSHER?" One grinned and shouted the "evil word".

"Nniaaaaargkkkkk"

Two laid a hand on his brother's arm.

"Please dear brother, do not mention that "evil word"! It does torment the high and almighty Chosen One if you say that evil word!" Two said gently.

"What word?" One asked innocently.

"PENPUSHER" Two shouted happily.

"THAT´S ENOUGH NOW!" Morpheus shouted.

"Get your sorry little asses out of here and leave us alone!!"

One looked playfully at Two.

"Should we, dear brother?"

Two removed some imaginary dust grains from his linen shirt.

"Only if he promises to help us with something!"

"I won't let me get blackmailed!" Morpheus protested.

Two raised his eyebrows.

"Are you sure? Just imagine, something happens in the church…say during the wedding ceremony?" he asked kindly.

"You wouldn't dare…." Morpheus grumbled.

"PENPUSHER" One shouted merciless.

"Aaarghh!" whined Neo and started giggling madly.

"Alright, alright….what do you want?" Morpheus asked defeated.

"You are going to give us a crash course in how to be a proper husband. We fear we are going to need that, after we…screwed up last evening!"

**

Ohoh, Morpheus teaching the Twins?

Can anything good come out of that?

(*) Thanks to Dylan for that inspiration ;-)

The song is a traditional German song and that boring and meaningless that you don't want me to translate it, do you?


	10. Shit happens!

Disclaimer: Blablabla…

**

„Let's get out of here! " Two suggested as the cheering crowd went to congratulate the freshly married couple.

One nodded and craned his neck to spot Felice under the guests. During the whole ceremony her face had terribly resembled a thundercloud and she had pointedly ignored them. They left the church and entered the restaurant where they headed for the men's room.

"I need to get out of this…well it would be a mockery to call these clothes!" One grumbled and fumbled at the pant's buttons.

Two left his cabin and turned to the sink to wash his hands.

He heard some quietly cursing out of his brother's direction.

"Do you have any problems in there? Hurry up; the meal starts in a few minutes!" Two addressed his twin who still hadn't left his cabin.

One coughed embarrassed.

Two adjusted his tie and sighed.

"What is it?" he asked slightly impatiently. One was always the lazy one.

"I….ahem…got some problems with the pants!" he whispered.

"Excuse me?"

"The pants…I can't get them open!" One whispered very quietly and very ashamed.

Two sighed.

"Well, get out of there and let me have a look at it!" he ordered One.

Slowly One opened the door of his toilet cabin and stepped out.

Two groaned. Somehow One had managed to get half of his shirt between the buttons and the integrated zipper.

He was stuck.

Literally.

**

"Yes, I think you're right, Trin. I really should talk to them, I mean, after all we're adults and nothing really bad had happened!"

Trinity beamed and patted Felice on the arm.

"That's right! And Julia isn't a competition for you!"

They entered the restaurant and Felice looked around.

"I wonder where they are…"

**

"I don't think that that's a good idea…" One complained as Neo kneeled down in front of him to solve his little dilemma.

"Oh shut up!" Neo hissed and bent down to examine the fastener.

He furrowed his brow.

One got fidgety.

"Keep still, will you?" Neo hissed.

"Don't stare at my crotch like this, wonder boy!" One hissed back. "That creeps me out!"

"I don't stare at your crotch! The mere thought makes me throw up! Now hold still!"

Suddenly he grinned.

"And besides, what's there to stare?"

"What do you mean with that?" One flared up and nudged him on the head.

"Aargh! That's it! I don't care, do what you want! I'm not going to help you anymore if you're behaving this immature!"Neo shouted and got up.

Better said he tried to.

*Zzzippp*

"Aargh! Morpheus, help me! Help me, I'm stuck!!" Neo screeched and jumped.

While getting up his tie got caught in the half open fastening of One's pants.

"Two! Help!!" One screamed and shuddered. Neo´s head was now, thanks to the voracious zipper of his pants, firmly stuck at height of his crotch.

Two twitched. Morpheus shuddered. Neo desperately tried to free himself. 

Two grabbed Neo´s head and tried to push it away from his crotch.

It was a mess.

In an attempt to help, Morpheus stepped behind Neo and tried to pull his head away, too.

"The switch blade, Two! Cut that damned tie!!" One hissed in panic.

Two pulled out his blade and approached Neo.

That was too much.

Seeing the razor blade getting near his throat, Neo screamed and tried to break free. The sudden motion catapulted the trio against the door which sprung open, so all of them stumbled out onto the restaurant's floor.

**

"Holy shit…." Felice managed to say.

"Oh..my…god..NEO!!" Trinity screeched as she noticed the location of her boyfriend's face.

Morpheus, Neo and One froze on their spot and slowly looked at the women.

Two used the opportunity to cut Neo´s tie and free him out of the dilemma.

Trinity put her hands on her hips, her eyes flaring. Felice looked shocked.

"Neo my dear, would you be so kind to explain to me what that was?" Trinity purred dangerously quiet.

Neo´s face blushed deep red as he tried to explain.

While she listened to Neo´s stammering, someone tapped Felice on the shoulder. She turned around and looked at one of the waiters.

"Excuse me, Mrs. Guildenstern-Jumeaux?"

"You bastard!! Cheating on me, he?" Trinity screeched behind her back.

"Yes?"

"Nononono…please darling..please, it´s not how it looks like! Let me explain!" whimpered Neo.

"There's someone who wishes to speak to you!" the man gestured toward the entrance door.

"Okay, I'm coming!" Felice sighed and left Trinity to deal with the disaster.

**

The restaurant her family had rented for the wedding festivities belonged to the rooms of a very big and very expensive meeting place. She stepped out on the floor and looked around. Suddenly someone approached her from behind and covered her eyes with his hands.

"Guess who!" a familiar voice chuckled.

Felice groaned. Not today, please not, dear gods have mercy!!

"Tom?"

The hands gave her eyes free and she turned around. It was Tom, indeed.

Great!

"Tom, what are you doing here?" she sighed.

Tom gestured towards another hall of the building, which entrance was decorated with a huge banner.

"Annual meeting of the union of martial arts teachers" it said.

"Well isn't this funny? It seems that you're constantly crossing my way!" Felice made a lame attempt to be funny.

Tom suddenly looked at her with the darkest eyes she ever had seen. He took her hand.

"You know, Feli sweetheart, I don't believe any more that its coincidence, I believe its providence!" he whispered.

"What do you mean?" she asked suspiciously.

He stroked her arm.

"You look very lovely in that dress, my dear!" he purred seductively.

Felice blushed. She still wore that terrible red-white dirndl.

"I have to go now, they're serving lunch in a few minutes!" she said and tried to free her arm out of his grasp.

Instead of releasing her, Tom pulled her close.

And then he kissed her.

Felice, who still held a grudge against the Twins, was that shocked at the first moment that she wasn't able to protest.

Tom, who took that as a sign of appreciation, pulled her even close and deepened the kiss.

Finally Felices brain kicked in again and she freed herself out of his embrace.

"I'll see you later, sweetheart!" Tom purred and vanished in the crowd again.

Felice just stood there dumbfounded for a few seconds, and then she decided to return into the restaurant.

"Well, if that isn't a surprise!" someone giggled evilly behind her back.

She turned around.

Damn!

It was Julia…

"So the model daughter and wife isn't that well-behaved like every body believes! You know, I would be very cautiously now with what I say if I were you…"

**

At night, in Felices room.

"What shall I do?" 

"Well, you can't do pretty else than waiting and avoiding Tom as much as possible. And avoiding Julia, of course." Trinity pondered.

They were sitting on Felices bed and drinking Whisky.

"You're right, but what do I do if she starts flirting with them again? I'm not sure if I could hold back myself…" Felice gulped and stared at the glass in her hand.

Trinity sighed and helped herself to another drink.

"Why don't you tell them?"

Felice coughed.

"I can't! That's impossible! They would kill him if they knew! You know how protective they are about me…"

Trinity's gaze darkened and she clenched her fist. Felice patted her on the shoulder.

"Are you still angry because that little…accident?" 

"No, no of course not!" Trinity hissed through her teeth.

Felice laughed.

"And you told me to act like an adult!"

Trinity smiled.

"Cheers!"

"Prost!"

**

At the same time in Neo´s room

Morpheus grinned and cleared his throat.

After the unfortunately events of the morning Neo had asked to be taught about how to be a proper husband too.

Now the three of them stood in a line, mournful expressions on their faces, while Morpheus paced up and down and stroked his imaginary beard.

Oh he never had felt better since his days as captain of the Nebuchadnezzar. Before Niobe had gotten pregnant, he corrected himself quietly.

"Well…" he began awfully slowly.

Two sighed impatiently.

One suppressed the temptation to whisper "pen pusher" into Neo´s ear, who stood next to him.

Neo listened intently while his facial expression changed from mournful to that of a puppy dog.

Morpheus smirked.

"Well young friends, the first step to keep a woman at your side is to keep the house clean!" he stated, stopped in front of Two and looked him critically in the eye.

Two sighed irritated.

"Answer me; did you ever clean a toilet?"

Two shook his head.

"And you! Did you ever in your life wash the curtains?" he addressed One.

One looked at him as if he had gone nuts.

"Of course not, I'm an assassin! A real good one too! I don't need to wash curtains!" One said stubbornly and tried to look menacingly.

Morpheus just laughed at him.

"And you, did you ever cook a meal for your wife- I mean girlfriend?"

Neo looked ashamed down on his feet. Then he quietly whispered "No".

Morpheus started pacing again.

"Well, today we'll start with something simple!" he opened a closet and pulled out a strange looking machine that none of the Twins had seen in their lives before.

"Today I teach you how to use a vacuum cleaner!" Morpheus beamed.

Five minutes later, all three of them tried to clean the carpet with a terrible old and monstrous looking vacuum cleaner. Neo, who proudly held the pipe, danced in small circles over the carpet and whistled the melody from "YMCA". Two had been ordered to carry the cleaner itself and cursed quietly because on the case of the cleaner seemed to be more dirt then on the whole floor. He feared for his coat and pants. One had been ordered to watch and learn and got bored from all the dancing and whistling. He wrinkled his nose.

"Moooorphi!!!" it yelled from next door. Morpheus twitched.

"I'll be back in a minute! Please _don't_ do anything stupid!!" 

He left the room to look after Niobe.

"You've overlooked a bit of fluff. There!" One pointed at a perfectly clean spot on the carpet.

Neo sighed.

"There's nothing!"

"There is!"

"Where?"

"There!" One stepped forward and bent down to show the fluff to the chosen One.

Unfortunately, he got to close to the cleaner pipe and it accidentally vacuumed the border of his coat in. One cursed.

"Turn it off, turn it off! It has eaten my coat!"

Neo fumbled with the pipe.

"Turn it off!"

"Stop yelling, I'm trying!" Neo scolded.

"I knew that you're incompetent, damn pen pusher!"

"Aaarggghhh!" screamed Neo.

"Oh no!" sighed Two and let go off the cleaner to help his twin.

In the attempt to throw his arms over his head, the pipe in Neo´s hands got off One's coat and tilted upwards. Neo himself cowered on the floor and whimpered.

Now _unfortunately the pipe got near One's throat. Too near._

"Help!!"

**

"You know, the alcohol I brought from Zion is really good. I distilled it myself!" Trinity said proudly as they were on their way to her room to fetch more to drink.

Felice giggled.

"You've distilled your own schnapps?"

"Yeah, after Neo decided to play the insurance broker I really needed a hobby! I tried knitting, making pottery, sumo wrestling and nude painting."

They finally reached the room Trinity shared with Neo.

"What's that noise?" Felice asked suddenly.

Trinity opened the door.

And cursed.

Two had finally succeeded in getting off the cleaner's pipe from his brother's throat.

Next to them, Morpheus held Neo in something that awfully resembled an embrace. It didn't exactly improve the impression that Neo mumbled strange things and that his hips twitched.

Felice now entered the room and gaped.

Right on One's throat was a HUGE red blotch that suspiciously looked like a love bite.

A HUGE love bite.

The men smiled embarrassed.

The girls looked at each other, then turned on their heels and left the room.

"Oh wonderful!" One groaned as the door smashed shut.

"Now they're thinking we're gay!"

**

Trinity decided to look after Niobe to calm her nerves.

"We've got to help her somehow!" Trinity said to her after she told Niobe about Julia's black mailing.

Niobe grinned evilly.

"Don't worry! I know a few really good tricks…."

"And we have to stay near to her!"

"Of course! As long as she's inside the house that's no problem for me, but outside you'll have to look after her!" Niobe said and patted her belly.

Trinity looked grim.

"I will!"

**

The next morning

"You know, I've always liked your red dress. That one with the silver fastenings!" Julia purred after she had spotted and cornered Felice in the kitchen.

 Felice said nothing and looked out of the small window.

"And the golden ring grandma gave to you last Christmas!"

Trinity entered the kitchen from the other side and joined Niobe in front of the coffee machine. Between them and Felice stood several cupboards so that she couldn't see them.

"Why did you leave her alone?" Trinity asked irritated and watched Julia bullying her friend who still remained quiet.

Niobe filled coffee in two cups and decorated them with whipped cream and chocolate powder.

"That looks delicious!" Trinity said and reached for the second cup. Niobe shook her head.

"Ahahahaa…that's _especially_ for Felice!" she twinkled, took the cup and went over to Felice.

Julia looked up in disgust as Niobe approached them.

"For you Feli, you look as if you could need a good coffee! That's my speciality, I call it ´dark dream´."

Felice took the cup from her and Niobe went back to the corner where Trinity stood. 

Delicious fragrances after coffee, cream and chocolate flooded the room.

Niobe mentioned for Trinity to listen and watch.

"And I could need a new coat as well!"

Julia licked her lips.

Then she grabbed the mug out of Felices hands.

"Hey!" Felice protested.

"And I'm thirsty!"

She took a deep swig, smiled arrogantly and left the room.

Trinity and Niobe joined Felice who looked really angry.

"And what was that all about?" Trinity wanted to know. Niobe smirked and gave a small bottle to her.

"Laxative extra strong. Only use three drops." Trinity opened the bottle. It was empty.

Felices eye grew big. 

"You haven´t…."

Niobe cackled.

"You wouldn't…" Trinity stammered.

"But that's personal injury!"

"Hah! Did Felice offer her the cup? No! It's her own responsibility if she drinks something that wasn't meant for her!"

 Trinity and Felice started laughing.

"Niobe you're evil!" 

Niobe looked terribly smug.

"Evil? You don't know what's really evil!"

She took a ring with several keys out of her pocket.

"That, ladies, is _evil_!"

"What's that?" Felice wanted to know.

Niobe smiled dangerously.

Suddenly they heard the sound of someone running wildly upstairs.

"These dear, are the keys to every single toilet in the whole house!"

**

The three of them decided to spend the rest of the day in the privacy of Felices room where they looked videos and ate pizza. The men had been banished from this room because Felice and Trinity were still angry with them. Although Trinity offered her to stay with her the night, Felice refused. She had a hobby to pursue.

"Haunting Julia"

"She's doing it again!" said One as they watched some boring show on TV.

"I know.." Two said.

"We shouldn't let her roam the house in her ghost form. It's still dangerous for her; remember when she got stuck in the staircase?"

Two looked up.

"How could I? The one half of her was in the staircase, the other half in the elevator!"

Then he furrowed his brow.

"You're right! We should look after her and we have to talk to her anyway! The whole thing is childish! We will excuse and everything will be alright again!"

One sighed and nodded.

"Yes, and we don't like to sleep alone anymore!"

"Then let's go!"

They floated through the house and came to a halt in front of a door.

"What does she want inside there?" One asked confused.

Then suddenly a silent scream teared the blockade away that Felice had built up between them the last days. The connection was there again and her surprise and her dismay flooded their own minds. Fast as lightening, they floated into the room where a shaking Felice wasn't able to control her ghost form anymore and phased back and forth. The twins got solid and Two embraced Felice in strong arms to calm her down a bit.

"Sshh its okay, we're here!"

"What's wrong?" One asked warily and looked around the darkened room.

With a shaking finger Felice pointed at the bed.

One stepped closer. There on the bed laid Julia, her baby blue eyes wide open and already dull. 

The skilled assassin he was, One immediately noticed that she wasn't breathing anymore.

**

Who has done it?

Any presumptions?

It took me _hours to write this chapter, so please, please review!!_


	11. Hide and seek

Disclaimer: I neither own the Matrix nor the Twins, poor me…

**

Felice and the Twins looked down on Julia's motionless body with the opened eyes.

Two stroked Felices hair while One carefully examined the corpse.

Finally One got up.

"And?" Felice asked with still shaking voice.

"She didn't die a natural death! But I have to take a closer look to find out what has happened to her. Maybe she died out of pure shock!" One said and grinned at her. Then he stepped beside Felice, embraced her and wiped a single tear out of his eye.

"We are so proud of you, aren't we Two? Your first kill!" he sniffed sentimentally. Two nodded approvingly.

Felices eyes grew big.

"It wasn't me! I didn't kill her! She was already dead as I entered the room!"

Two grinned at her.

"And what did you want in here? At night? All alone?"

"And in those clothes?" One added and winked.

"It wasn't me!" Felice insisted and blushed furiously.

One and Two just looked knowingly at each other.

"Well, we can't leave her in here!" Felice said finally.

"Why not?"

"Because I can't rule out that nobody has seen me getting up here! I don't want to be accused of murder!"

"Okay, no problem!" One said lightly and through the dead body unceremonially over his shoulder.

"Let's go!"

**

The next morning

Sandra walked down the corridor and furrowed her brow in concentration.

Felice wasn't in her room. She hadn't dared to knock at Niobes door because she silently feared the dark woman's temperament.

And as she had stood in front of Trinity's door she had heard several unmistakeable noises that indicated that she'd better not disturb them right now.

Sandra shook her head, she didn't know that one could use a lady shaver for that…

Well, if Felice wasn't in these rooms there was only one room left where she could possibly be at that time in the morning.

She arrived in front of the suite she knew aunt Annalena had given to her daughter and her sons-in-law. Sons-in-law!

Who had ever heard of a country where you could marry twins?

She took a deep breath and knocked.

Several moments later she heard some noises from inside and the door was opened.

Sandra gulped. She had prayed that it would be Felice who opened the door, but now she looked right at one of her husbands who smiled down on her.

A real predator smile she thought and blushed.

She couldn't keep them apart and felt more than a bit uneasy in their company.

The heat crept up her face and she gulped again. She truly loved and adored Klaus but her husband couldn't quite compare with the sight of an almost naked albino who only wore a towel round his waist and on whose chest still glittered water drops. 

She told herself not to stare too much and gulped again. Her mouth was awfully dry.

"Ahem…good morning! Is Felice here?" she asked.

The predator's smile widened.

"Yes, she is. Come in!" he purred and mentioned for her to enter the room.

She stepped in and mentally slapped herself. She had caught the wrong door! That was not their living room, definitely not! It was their bedroom!

The wet albino closed the door behind her and left her alone. The curtains were still closed and her eyes needed a few moments to adjust to the dim light. Suddenly she wished she hadn't decided to wear a mini dress this morning. It made her feel vulnerable. Sandra shook her head. Nonsense! These were Felices husbands and they wouldn't dare to approach her in any improper way!

"Good morning, my dear!" purred suddenly a second voice out of the dark.

Sandra almost jumped.

A small motion made her look at the big bed in the middle of the room where husband No.2 laid. He smiled at her lasciviously.

"Good morning!" she repeated huskily and made a few steps towards him.

Mistake!

His skin was almost exactly the same shade of white as the sheets he was lying on. In fact the only thing that stood out against the whiteness was the dark sunglasses. She wondered if they wore them even in sleep. 

Don't stare, she reminded herself! 

The well muscled man lay almost elegantly on a heap of velvet cushions and held a smoking cigarette lazily in his hand.

The white silk cover was pulled down to his waist. If she would take a close look she could almost see….

Fortunately, Felice finally appeared. She wore a fluffy white bathrobe and looked tired.

"Good morning, my dear!" she embraced Sandra and took her arm.

"Let's go into the living room!"

Then she picked up a shirt and threw it onto the bed. No.2 caught it easily and grinned at her.

"Get dressed! And get us some breakfast!" Felice ordered him and opened the door to living room. She pulled Sandra out of the bed room just as No.2 was about to get up and reveal even more of his marble-white skin.

Felice closed the door and mentioned for her to sit down on the couch.

"Did they embarrass you?" Felice asked as she sat down next to her.

Sandra blushed again. Her hands were sweaty.

Felice sighed.

"Just forget about that, they're doing it on purpose!" she smiled at her.

"Now what did you want to tell me?" 

Sandra snapped back into reality.

"Ah yes, your mother begged me to tell you that they are expecting a lot of guest for their silver wedding anniversary!"

Felice looked at her puzzled.

"Really a lot of guests!" Sandra tried to explain.

"In fact that many, that you have to share your suite with one or two of them!" she whispered.

Now Felice looked really worried.

"And when do they arrive?" she asked cautiously.

Sandra looked guilty.

"That's why I'm here that early! They arrive today, sometime in the morning!"

"WHAT??" Felice jumped up.

Sandra took her arm and got up too.

"They will sleep in the living room, on the sofas. Feli, is there something I can help you with?"

Felice mumbled something and dismissed her friend quickly. Damn her family! She glanced at the oaken trunk where they had left Julia's corpse last night. No chance! They had to hide the body somewhere else; at least till they would find out what had caused her death. She returned to the bed room where Two was busy preparing little bugs out of boiled eggs, red radish and mayonnaise for breakfast. He looked up as she stormed into the room.

"What's wrong Cherie?"

"Leave that be and get dressed! We have a corpse to hide!"

One smirked at her.

"Don't worry sweetheart, we're experts!" he walked into the next room and opened the trunk.

"Do we have some extra sheets? We should wrap her up!"

Felice ran into the bed room and returned with some sheets. 

Then someone knocked at the door. Hard.

Felice gestured wildly at the bed room. The twins took the corpse and the sheets and left the living room, all the time smirking.

It knocked again. This time very impatiently.

Felice smoothed her hair and tried to put on calm and slightly arrogant expression like the Twins always did. Then she opened the door.

A chubby old man and a sourly woman entered the suite and glanced at her angrily. Felice sighed inwardly.

"Uncle Josef, aunt Gretel! What a surprise! Welcome!" she smiled through gritted teeth.

"Humph, I don't know what your mother thinks but this is ridiculous! To share a room with a young couple!" Uncle Josef huffed.

"Where's your husband child?" 

"And where do we sleep? In there? Is there our bed room?" Josef took a step towards the bed room where One and Two prepared the "mummy".

"NO!!" Felice threw herself in front of the door and took her uncle's arm.

She forced herself to smile.

"You will sleep here!"

"What a shame! But I always knew that your mother…."

Gretel suddenly wrinkled her bony nose.

"What is that smell?"

Felice gulped.

"Smell? I don't smell anything!"

Gretel sniffed the air like a rottweiler.

"It smells like there is rotting something!" she sniffed again and followed an invisible trail that led towards the bed room.

"Don't go in there!" Felice screamed and jumped.

Aunt Gretel was faster.

With a triumphant glance she threw open the door and stepped in.

Felice sighed.

No sight of a like a mummy wrapped up Julia. Just One who bound his tie in front of the mirror.

Her aunt seemed disappointed.

A few minutes, One's best predator smile and some of his most charming compliments later, Aunt Gretel allowed them to keep their bed room and left them, a light blush creeping up her cheeks. Yes, One could be very convincing…

Felice closed the door and let herself fall against One who took her in his arms.

"Where is she?" she mumbled.

"Oh, Two took care of her. Don't worry!"

A few seconds later Two returned and smiled at them wickedly.

"And?" Felice demanded to know.

"I've found the perfect hideout. Know the old gallery with the rusty knight's armours?"

Felice grew stiff.

"The gallery? Have you gone nuts??"

Two looked at her puzzled.

Felice sighed.

"That's where the children like to play!! We have to get her back and find another place!"

The Twins sighed and together they left the room.

So they didn't see the maid who brought that real big bunch of red tulips for Felice. Since she wasn't there the maid gave the flowers to her aunt.

Gretel put them into a vase, read the card that was attached to them and vaguely wondered who that Tom guy was and why he wanted to meet her niece.

She was already married, wasn't she?

**

Oh oh, trouble coming…

Should I write something really dramatic involving Felice and our lovesick Tom?

You decide!


	12. Inspector Jumeaux

Disclaimer: I don't own the Matrix, unfortunately.

I know I haven't updated since a whole month….

But I'm very busy with university at the moment and I also had a little writer's block and didn't know where the story should go and how it possibly could end.

So I needed a little time to think…

I think we´ll have ca. 2-3 more chapters until the great show down..

And of course I´m not telling you yet who killed Julia!!

@Kralia:  Well, you got me there ;-) I must confess I didn´t think about that…let´s just pretend that they´re able to stay in the Matrix as long as they want without those drastic consequences!

@Triality:  Felice is a short form of Felicitas which is indeed latin and means luck. I always liked that name, maybe some day I´ll name my daughter after that ;-)

**

Because her mother had lots to organize for her silver wedding anniversary, Felice didn't have the time to check Julia's room until the late evening.

Now, that almost everybody had gone to bed she tiptoed the way up to her former cousin's room and stepped in. 

Everything was just as they had left it the other evening, the bed still undone. She lit one of the small lamps and pondered what to do. Uncertain, she paced up and down, opened Julia's closets and looked through her belongings.

Nothing that was not quite normal.

Felice sighed.

A hissing sound told her that One was about to phase into the room.

He materialized next to her and grinned.

"Already found something?"

"No! Where's Two?" Felice sounded frustrated.

"He has a far too nice conversation with aunt Gretel that I didn't have the heart to disturb the two of them!" he snickered.

Then he raised an eyebrow.

"You didn't find anything?"

Felice glanced at him angrily. One just smirked.

"Patience, my dear! I think that you just didn't look at the right places!"

"And what places could that be?"

One's coat billowed behind him as he spinned around and eyed the room. Then he stepped to the bed and started to examine it.

Felice eyed him sceptically.

"Ah!" One suddenly said.

"Look at that!" 

He showed a small black handkerchief to her.

"What's wrong with it? It's Julia's, I suppose!"

One shook his head and smiled at her. Then he gave it to her.

"Look at it closely. There are initials embroidered on it!"

"K.G." Felice read quietly.

Then her eyes grew big.

"No! That couldn't possibly mean…I mean…he wouldn't…not him, really!"

One laid an arm around her shoulder and squeezed her comfortingly.

"I'm sorry!" he whispered.

K.G.

Klaus Guildenstern.

Sandra's husband.

Shit!

**

With One's help she somehow made it back into their suite. They used the backdoor that straight led into their bedroom. Through the closed door to the living room they could hear Gretel's excited murmuring and Two's British accent that solemnly gave lectures about steak and kidney pie.

Felice threw herself onto the bed's cushions and buried her head underneath the precious silken sheets. 

One shook his head and approached the mini bar.

She heard the sound of liquid flowing into crystal glasses and then One's weight pushed the mattress down as he sat down beside her on the bed.

"Stop playing ostrich!" One teased and stroked her back.

Then he pulled the cushions away from her.

Felice sat up and accepted the cognac he gave to her.

They spent a few minutes in silence.

Then the door flew open and a humming Two came in and closed the door behind him.

He snatched the still half full glass out of his twin's hand and emptied it in one big sip. Then he sat down beside Felice and kissed her neck.

She pushed him away.

Two looked a little bit surprised. One raised his eyebrows. Then they smiled.

"Don't take it too serious, Cherie. He's only human, remember that!" One said and patted her shoulder.

"Mmmhhmm…"

"Yes, and who knows what other lovers the bitch had! Maybe it was some sort of jealousy accident!" Two whispered into her ear and then tried kissing her neck again.

"Mmmhhh…"

Felice closed her eyes and tilted her head backwards. Accepting the offer, Two leaned over and showered her neck with small wet kisses while One attempted to open her blouse.

Maybe that evening would still become pleasant!

"Darling?" One murmured while he was busy opening the silver buttons of her blouse with his teeth.

"Mmmhh?" Felices purr was muffled through Two's dreadlocks that hid her lovely face like behind a silver curtain.

"When does"

*Pop-fling*

Another button flew to the ground. 

"When does the party"

*pop-fling*

"Start tomorrow?"

*Pop-fling*

The last button was gone and he was rewarded with the appetizing sight of Felices new white silken bra. He sat his eyes on her pant's buttons.

How he loved a good challenge!

Meanwhile Two had reached her collarbone and worked his way further down.

"Well…" Felice began lazily while she enjoyed the pleasure of having two telepathic linked lovers.

"Tomorrow morning we have this nice little ceremony in the chapel…with the whole family."

Suddenly Two's head snapped up.

"Did you say…CHAPEL??" he stammered.

One stopped gnawing buttons and looked at him puzzled.

Felice yawned and stretched.

"Yes, of course. That's what chapels are for, remember?"

Two became now very nervous.

One gulped.

"You didn't…"

"It seemed to be the perfect hide-out, I swear!"

"You wouldn't…"

"How could I know…I mean I'm a program, what do _I_ know about human traditions?" 

Felice groaned as she guessed what all that brotherly arguing was about.

"Did you hide the corpse in the chapel??"

Two just looked at his feet.

"Great, just great!" she hissed and jumped to her feet.

"What are you doing, sweetheart?" One wanted to know, as Felice slipped into her shoes and a thin jacket.

"Now what does it look like?" she yelled.

One and Two twitched.

Felice never ever yelled.

"Stay! We're going to do this!" One insisted as Felice took a flashlight and a sack.

"Hah!! Do you think I would let you do this a third time alone? Then I bet you're hiding her right in front of my mother's nose!"

Fuming, she left the room.

The Twins looked at each other for a mere second and then followed her.

**

The gravel crunched under her feet as she went through the darkness. A small path led away from the mansion into the woods where the chapel was. Like the house itself it belonged to her family and they used it for the different festivities over the year. 

Only for Sandra's and Klaus wedding it had been too small.

Klaus.

She didn't want to think about him at the moment.

What would be harder to tell Sandra?

That her husband was a murderer?

Or that he did betray her?

Or both?

She didn't know.

Shuddering, Felice sped up as she entered the woods. Being here alone always gave her the creeps, although she knew of course that the Twins were right behind her and ready to rescue her from what ever might be lurking in here.

She finally reached the chapel and waited for One and Two to accompany her. After a few moments they became solid in front of her.

She looked at them grimly.

"Okay. Two, you go inside and get the corpse!"

Two nodded and phased again.

"And One, you go to the other side and keep watch while I'm watching here if someone's coming!"

One sighed and left.

Now Felice stood alone in the dark in front of the chapel's door and froze terribly.

Impatiently, she hopped from one foot to the other. The she heard a noise from the left side behind her.

Expecting Two carrying Julia's corpse, she turned around and smiled widely.

Of course it was not Two.

Tom stepped out of the woods and flashed his best boy group smile at her.

Felice shrieked.

"Shhh, it's just me sweetheart!" he whispered and crushed her ribs in a bone breaking embrace.

Then he kissed her.

"My beloved! I knew you would get my letter! And I know that you would come here to meet me! Did you like the flowers?"

Felice coughed and struggled in his embrace. She felt like the heroine in a cheap B-movie.

"Let go off me!" she demanded.

His embrace just got tighter.

"We two are simply destined for one another!" Tom breathed into her ear.

Felice shuddered. The man had become totally mad!

Then she gulped.

She suddenly remembered that she just wore her bra under her thin leather jacket. Damn One and his passion for buttons!

"We will flee this inhospitably country! We can go where ever you want!"

She struggled again but was just rewarded with a sly smile from him.

"We can move in at my mother's house! She will teach you everything a proper wife should know! We will grow our own corn and everything we need for a living!"

Slowly Felice felt panic creeping up her spine.

"And our children will be our greatest joy! I always wanted a big family! And you're still young enough to give birth to a couple of children!"

Now that was too much!

Having Niobes moody and big bellied appearance in mind, Felice finally succeeded in reaching into her pocket and grabbing the silver hilted razor blade Two had gave to her shortly after her marriage.

Remembering their lessons she lunged at him and cut his arm.

Tom yelped at the unexpected pain and let go off her.

Because she didn't want to fight against a martial arts expert Felice decided to simply run for her life. She was too over nervous to call out mentally for help from the Twins. But she knew that One was waiting somewhere at the chapel's backside. If she was fast enough to reach him, she would be safe.

She sprinted over the dark green grass, not really seeing the way before her feet.

Heavy breathing and quick steps followed her.

She finally reached the backside.

Out of breath and frightened to death she hid behind one of the larger trees and looked out for One.

It was pitch black.

And no sign of One!

And yet footsteps that came nearer and nearer.

She peeked around the tree and watched Tom looking around in confusion.

He had lost her.

Trying to clam down her thundering pulse she waited another moments till his tall figure disappeared around the corner.

Then she left the safety of the tree's shadow.

Where the hell was One?

There could be just one solution: he had entered the chapel to help Two wrapping up Julia's body.

Good.

That meant both of them were inside now.

She sneaked back to the entrance.

No Tom. And no Twins.

Carefully she tried to open the big metal gates. Groaning she succeeded in pushing them open just wide enough to wind her body inside.

Into safety.

Just as she was about to push herself through the opening, he grabbed her from behind, giggling madly.

She shrieked.

"What a nice idea, my love. Inside we're undisturbed!"

Tom pushed the gates open wide and shoved her inside, twisting her arm so badly that she cried out in pain.

They stumbled inside.

Right into two white clad persons.

And one of them carried a corpse in his arms.

"Hide!!" Tom yelled and pushed her to the ground.

"There they are again! The criminals that attacked me, they're following me!"

Then he puffed his chest and smirked.

"Well, let's bring it to an end!" he said dramatically.

Two dropped the corpse down on the ground and whirled his blade. With an infuriated scream he attacked.

One at the meantime bent down to check on Felice.

The poor woman in question sat on the stony ground, rubbed her aching arm and asked herself why she always ended lying on the floor and in the bad need to be rescued.

One knelt down beside her embraced her and almost drowned in feelings of guilt.

Felice rubbed her temples and checked if she hadn't lost her razor blade.

Just a few feet next to her, Tom cried out in shock as he saw Two phasing. But he didn't stop fighting.

"I'll teach you not to molest other men's wives!" she could hear Two hiss at him.

"You will not insult my lady! Such a lovely maiden could never bind herself to such a creature as you!" Tom hissed back.

"What's wrong?" One asked worried as Felice started to rob on her hands and knees over the floor.

"My switch blade! I must have lost it as he pushed me….there it is!" she cried out happily and held it up into the air.

*Fling*

The blade slipped out of her sweaty hand.

And flew through the air.

The massive silver hilt blinked in the dim moon light that shown through the coloured windows.

*Pong*

And made painfully contact with the back of Tom´s head.

And knocked him out.

He dropped dead just as Two was about to blow a really nasty hit.

Half an hour later Felice regarded the two wrapped up bundles that they had carried into one of the many unused rooms of the mansion, a laundry room in their case.  

One of them dead, the other unconsciously.

Great!

Now they had not only a corpse to dispose but a captive to hide as well.

Just great!

**   

Review?

Please??


	13. Mystery man

Disclaimer:  Blablabla…

If you have a sensitive stomach, I would advise you not to read this chapter ;-)

And many thanks to "busy little crumpet" who suggested this chapter with her review!

And did I already mention that I love you all *hugs* ??

**

_Trinity's mental diary:_

Today was the long awaited silver anniversary of Felices parents.

Everybody was in a hurry to get dressed and ready in the morning.

Took a shower and wanted to shave arm pits and legs afterwards.

Couldn't find lady shaver.

Suspect Neo took it again.

Asked him about it and he blushed.

Precious shaver so full of disgusting men's hair that I decided to leave it that way.

Unfortunately forgot that chosen dress for party was sleeveless.

Had to constantly remember myself for rest of day not to hold up arms to avoid that people see small jungle in arm pits.

Niobe extremely moody today and watched Morpheus all the time.

Embarrassing incident in chapel as someone asked Neo if he could lend him a _pen._

Felice not looking all too well today.

Discovered her eyeing Klaus sceptically.

Discovered Sandra ogling Twins in return.

Twins grinned and snickered all the time and burst out in laughter as I asked what was so funny and said that they looked like they had hid a corpse in the cellar.

**

Felice pulled her husbands in a small empty room. She looked rather nervous.

"We have to get rid of the corpse!" she said.

The Twins looked at her. She shrugged.

"Well, it starts smelling in case you haven't noticed yet! And we can't have Tom finding out about this too!"

"And what do you suggest, my love?" One asked.

Felice pulled them closer and lowered her voice to a whisper.

"There's a cold-storage room downstairs in the cellar! Bring her there and hide her well, people already wonder where she could be!"

"No problem, my dear! We're experts after all!" Two assured her.

Felice nodded.

"And in the meantime I'm going question Sandra about this husbands of hers!"

**

_Niobes mental diary: _

Am feeling awfully fat and shapeless today.

Suspect that everybody's avoiding me.

Again.

Don't know why though.

Just told Trinity to keep her arms down because _that_ much hair in that location really is disgusting.

And just told Neo to stop acting like a mad man just when someone say "_pen" or "__pen pusher" or just any word related with "__pen" or "_pusher_"._

And just asked Felice if two husbands weren't enough for her that she has to ogle Klaus too.

Nymphomaniac!

Had nobody to talk therefore decided to ravage the buffet.

Ate some smoked salmon, chocolate cake, lasagne, roast beef, mixed pickles, boiled eggs with mustard, prawns in cocktail sauce, some rabbit in apple wine (delicious), potatoes salad, mashed potatoes, chicken pie (a bit too salty), sauerkraut, some strange white sausages, mousse au chocolat, an apple, Irish stew, Peking duck, tomato soup, fresh bread, green salad, mushrooms with onions and bacon, two hamburgers and three hotdogs (very good).

Forego a second course; have to watch my weight after all!

**

As everybody left the chapel and went to the dining hall, the Twins made their way to hide a corpse.

Again.

Just as they wanted to clear out, someone approached them and tugged lightly at Two's arm.

They turned around and faced Felices father, today especially clad in a white pinstripe suit and a matching white and expensive tie.

He smiled at them and puffed his usually cigar.

The Twins straightened up for they had quickly learned what that kind of smile meant.

It was the same smile the Merovingian had always used when he had something really bad and nasty in mind.

"Ah, my dear sons-in-law! How nice to have you here! Are you enjoying yourselves, boys?" he asked jovially but the steel underneath that simple question was not to be overheard by One's and Two's trained ears.

"We really-" One began.

"Do enjoy ourselves!" Two continued.

"Thank you very much!" One finished.

Hagen Guildenstern grinned, stepped between them and took them by the arms.

Two felt a creep wind up his spine and shot One a quick glance. They wouldn't forget that Felices father was a program like themselves and not a human. So he was not to be underestimated!

"Just a word of advise!" the older man began and carefully inspected his half smoked cigar.

He slowed their tempo down so that the rest of the family overtook them.

"I've came to notice that _you_ and my dear beloved daughter are kind of …let's say night active!" he smiled at them.

The Twins raised their eyebrows.

"It was reported to me that you were at the chapel last night and I even won't mention roaming the mansion at night! But I was told that you had some kind of a wild and merry orgy…" he didn't need to finish the sentence.

Two gulped.

Shit!

"You can do whatever you please in your bedroom, don't understand me wrong! But I won't let a sacred place be defiled! Consider yourselves as warned!"

He let go off their arms and turned to leave.

"Just one last thing!" he suddenly said and faced them again.

"Yes?" One asked warily.

"You're over a half year married now. How does it come that in spite off all these dissipations I'm not a grandfather yet?"

Now the Twins really started sweating!

"Uhhhmm…." One started and looked help seeking at his twin.

But Two was already doing his favourite gold fish imitation. Open mouth. Close mouth. Open mouth. Close mouth.

One nudged him.

Children were a discussion theme that wasn't really well liked either from Felice nor the Twins.

"Well, you should hurry up a bit. I'm an old man, you know, and she's my only daughter!"

And with that their talk was over.

**

"Hallo…"

"Hallo Feli! Where have you been, I waited for you outside the chapel!" Sandra said as the two women sat down at a small table a bit away from the others.

Felice had told Trinity (who seemed to have spasms in both upper arms) that she needed to talk about something very intimate to her cousin and so they did let them have their privacy.

Felice poked her steak experimentally. Medium. Very good! The Twins always wanted their meat English which disgusted her to no ends.

"Now, how does it feel to be married?" she asked experimentally.

"Oh well, it's perfect!" Now that sounded a bit unconvincing.

"What's wrong?" Felice asked carefully.

"Oh, nothing. It's just…"

Sandra shrugged and looked a bit worried.

Felice gave her an encouraging squeeze.

"There are photos from the bachelor parting party, you know. And Klaus…he had some women sitting on his lap and now I fear…"

Felice almost choked on a carrot.

"There are photos? Who has them?" she asked excited.

"Julia did let make them. But I don't know where she is, haven't seen her the last few days. But that's nothing new to me. She comes and goes as she pleases."

"So they have to be in her room!" Felice murmured. Then she noticed Sandra's confused look.

"I'm sorry. Was it her? Sitting on Klaus lap, I mean. On the photo." She explained and leaned over the table.

Sandra shook her brown curls.

"No, not her. Some other strip girls but not Julia. He can't stand her, you have to know. It's just that he wants to be nice to _everybody_!" she complained.

Felice thought at the handkerchief in her bag and sighed.

If that only could be true!

**

"It has to be at the bottom of this stairway!" One announced cheerfully.

They had "borrowed" a laundry waggon to transport the stiff, smelling corpse and searched now for the cold-storage room which had to be somewhere in the area they were at the moment. 

"There it is!" Two hissed a few moments later and pointed at a big steel framed door. 

One pushed it open and his brother rolled the waggon in. He wrinkled his slender nose in disgust as he heaved the corpse out of the vehicle. Julia smelled in death even badder than in life. But that shouldn't surprise him, the only human's scent that he found bearable, yes even appealingly delicious was Felices and even she wasn't fully human anymore since their binding.

He shouldered the corpse and let his gaze wonder through the storage room. 

Suddenly he grinned at One and pointed at the pig's and cow's halves that hung down at hooks from the ceiling.

"Do you still remember what we used to do at the Merovingian's when we were to get rid off a corpse?"

One grinned in return and approached a butcher's table.

"Here's a saw!" he snickered.

Two put the body down.

"I'll go looking for some containers!"

It turned out that they needed four meat containers in the end.

As Two watched his twin squeezing the last part into the fourth container (an arm, her left if he remembered right) he was surprised to see a tinge of light green grazing his normally silky white cheeks. And his own stomach didn't seem to be that happy about a task that was just a year before totally usually for them to do.

He sighed.

One end of their binding was that Felice had inherited some of their program skills like phasing and telepathy.

The other end had brought them some of her human abilities and right now he wasn't very pleased with them since they hindered them to do what was necessary.

Not really hinder, but…

He remembered that Felice got sick if she only got sight of a single blood drop. An open wound had her even made pass out once.

Two saw One gulping as he closed the container and look down at his coat and his bloody hands.

"Well? Phase!" he snapped at One and followed his own advice immediately.

"Now we're feeling much better!" he stated the obvious for the green tinge had left his twin's face that was now his old arrogant and blood licking self as usual.

"We need a safe place for these!" One tapped one of the containers.

"There's a room next door which seems not to be well used, let's get them there!"

They hid the containers behind others of the same kind as One noticed something on the floor.

He picked it up.

It was a bank note with the number "500" printed on it.

The Twins looked at each other, furrowing their brows and then simultaneously started to look through the other containers which they had expected to be empty.

Two whistled.

"Someone has hid a fortune in here!"

At the end they found twelve meat containers full of money.

Just as Two was about to make a smart comment, they heard a door open and light came through a crack in the wall.

A crack?

They quickly closed the containers and phased through the wall where they suspected a secret door. They ended in a conference hall.

Wait a minute!

There wasn't supposed to be a room down here!

One smirked at Two.

*it looks like we've found the "business rooms"*

They let their ghostly bodies sink into the floor till only the top of her heads was to be seen and floated across the hall, which was mainly decorated in black and red. At the other side there was a wide open door to a small office and that's where the light and the noise had come from.

The twins started stalking.

"Is everything ready?" a somehow familiar voice asked.

"Yes, it is. What about the girl?" another male voice answered.

"I took care of her!"

The second voice cackled.

"Too clever for you that one, wasn't she?"

"Her cleverness didn't do her any good at last!" the first voice snapped.

"Did you kill her?"

"She shouldn't have blackmailed me!"

"But what about the corpse?" the second voice now sounded insecure.

"I left a trail for the police. It's easy, really! No one will think of me!" the first tried to show off.

"You should have thrown her in a lake or something. Makes it look like a robbery!"

"Well, that's too late now. We have to carry on as planned and in a week we're safe somewhere in the south and drink daiquiris!"

"Well, if you say it…"

"I have to go now! Someone could miss me at that boring party they're having!"

**

In the meantime, upstairs in the dining hall.

"Is everything alright? Your face turns a little bit green, you know." Sandra said worried as she watched her cousin carefully.

Felice looked down on her half eaten steak and a sudden wave of nausea hit her like a bomb.

She gulped and staggered to her feet.

"Excuse me, I fear I'm going to puke!" she cried and made a run for the bath room. 

Just as she turned around the corner she collided with someone and got to the ground very uncomfortably. Her bag flew open and passed out its contents on the floor.

A slightly annoyed Jürgen knelt down beside her and took her arm.

"I'm sorry, I didn't see you coming! Are you alright?" he said.

"Sure!" Felice managed to say.

"Wait, I'll help you with the bag!" Jürgen offered and together they collected the items.

"Here's your lipstick, your comb and you're…handkerchief…" Jürgen said and suddenly looked at her warily.

Felice got Goosebumps and started cold sweating at once.

Something wasn't right!

Definitely!

He slowly, very slowly offered her the black handkerchief which initials K.G. seemed to glow in the electric light.

She took it from him and hastily put it back into her bag.

Suddenly Jürgen smiled.

"What are you doing with a man's handkerchief, Felice?" he asked slyly.

Felice shrugged nervously.

"Found it somewhere on the floor…"

Jürgen got up and smiled at her scarily.

"Well, have a nice day then!"

Felice nodded and turned around, her nausea long forgotten.

"And take good care of you!" he added just before he left the corridor.

Felice shuddered.

To be continued….

**

No corpse was harmed during writing this!

And yes, Tom´s going to die!

….

….

If I´m getting plenty of reviews!!


	14. death chapter

I know, I know it's been a long time but I've been very busy!

And here it is!

Enjoy!

**

Tom groaned.

A heavy headache and a sour taste in his dry mouth greeted him.

He opened his eyes very slowly.

It was dark and the air smelled musty.

And he couldn't move.

A strand of sweaty hair fell in his eyes as he tried to free himself out of the bonds that held him flat on the floor.

No chance!

Grumbling, he rolled himself over the dusty stone floor till he reached a door.

Collecting his last power, he started bumping his legs against it.

**

"YOU´VE HID A CORPSE IN THE CELLAR???" Trinity shouted at her best friend angrily.

She shook her head.

Apparently it was not possible to keep Felice and "trouble" separated.

"SShhhhh!" Felice hissed and watched her bedroom warily. Aunt Gretel was snoring loudly next door.

"AND YOU´VE KIDNAPPED YOUR MARTIAL ARTS TEACHER? ARE YOU GONE NUTS??"

"Sshhh!" Felice winced again.

Trinity shook her head again and reached for the bottle beside her friend's bed.

"And what are you going to do now?" she asked after a really long sip of Kirschwasser.

Felice shrugged.

"That's exactly my problem. I don't want him to get killed…"

Trinity raised an eyebrow.

"But we just can't let him go that easily. He would go and press charges against the Twins immediately!"

She sighed and snatched the bottle out of Trinity's hands.

They passed a long moment in silence.

Well, not exactly…

"Rronnnfschnurchel….Chhrrrr…ghhrarcchhhh.." it came from next door.

"And what about the corpse?" Trinity asked finally.

"One and Two take care of that." 

"Ha!" Trinity coughed.

Felice shot her a glare.

Her friend smiled apologetically.

"So it was Jürgen…"

"Hmm."

"Well, at least it wasn't Klaus! That really would've been a shame!" Trinity said and patted Felices leg.

"So what can we do?"

Felice straightened up and her eyes started gleaming.

"I'm going to go through Julia's room again tonight! There must be something left that proves his guilt!"

Trinity nodded.

"I will accompany you!"

**

Finally.

He heard footsteps getting nearer his prison and then the door opened and bright light blinded him.

Someone shrieked as he/she almost tripped over his bounded body.

A bundle of dirty clothes fell to the ground.

"Oh gottogottogottogott!! You poor, poor man!" a female voice cried and a small figure in a chamber maid's costume bend over him.

"I'll help you!"

**

Meanwhile, the Twins were lying in wait in the cold storage room.

They had changed some of the money containers against their "corpse containers" and were now waiting what would happen next.

Already half an hour later Jürgen and his companion appeared and started loading their precious freight into a small dirty brown van. They finished loading and Jürgen started pondering. The second man approached him and nudged him playfully.

"We're ready, let's go!" apparently he was in a cheerful mood.

Jürgen shook his head.

"Not yet."

"Why not? We have the money and no one will miss us tonight! They think we have a date in town!"

"There's still something left for me to do! We'll meet again in 30 minutes!"

"But then we will leave this place?"

"Then we will leave!" Felices cousin promised.

"What now?" One whispered as Jürgen left the underground parking next to the cold storage room with resolutely steps.

Two gestured towards the second man who now leaned against the van and lit a cigarette.

"You'll continue watching him! I'll go and follow this ill-conceived thing!"

One nodded.

"And he can only hope that whatever gods he's praying to will show mercy on him if he's only _thinking_ about getting after Felice!" he added.

Two just smiled evilly.

**

The same time, Neo´s room.

"STAND AT ATTENTION!" Morpheus shouted.

Neo saluted smartly. Thereby the loose ends of his pink flowered scarf slipped him in the eyes.

His hands closed tight around his brand new mop.

Morpheus paced up and down the room.

"NOW ANSWER: WHAT ARE THE THREE SECRETS TO WIN A WOMAN´S HEART?"

"Yes Sir, the three secrets to win a woman's heart is 1. Cooking, 2. Keep the house clean and 3. Hold her bags when she's shopping, Sir!"

Morpheus paced some more and smiled evilly.

"And what is the most important of all?" he asked.

"Yes Sir, Keeping the house clean, Sir!"

"PRESENT THE MOP!"

"Hyyyyiiiaaaa!"

Neo pulled his mop with a start into the air and nearly poked the stick into his left eye.

"Moooorphiii!!" it suddenly yelled from next door.

Morpheus twitched.

"I need to go to the bathroom! Get your lazy ass over here and help me getting out of this armchair!" Niobe yelled impatiently.

Morpheus winced and let his shoulder slump down.

**

Cackling, Tom limped in a surprising speed through the corridors.

After the maid had freed him he had thrown the poor girl into one of the many laundry wagons and locked her in for good.

Now it was time to flee this scary house and call the police, the army, whatever!

Two searched criminals, killers even! And a damsel in distress to rescue!

Yes, he would save the day!

But those headaches!

He hid behind a big plant as a couple came out of a room and entered another. The woman seemed to be pregnant with triplets.

He looked around and then experimentally tried to open the door of their room.

It was open!

Hastily he got in and searched for something to sooth his pain.

**

"Nothing!" Felice said disappointed.

Trinity sighed.

They had searched Julia's room very carefully but hadn't found anything that gave evidence about what had caused her death at least.

"I need to wash my hands!" Trinity said and entered the small bathroom next to Julia's bed.

With a frustrated sigh, Felice sat down on her cousin's bed and put her face into her palms. A small noise made her startling.

She looked up.

Right into Jürgens grim looking face.

No good!

Her gaze wandered to his right hand. A garrotte!

Wonderful!

"You're not seriously expecting to come through with this, aren't you?" she whispered.

"Why not, dear cousin? I came through with a first kill, thanks to you. Why should a second do any harm?" he grinned.

Felice coughed.

"What did she do to deserve _that_?"

He snickered.

"Oh come on, Feli! You know damn well what she has been doing! Didn't she blackmail you too?"

"But was there no other way?"

"No, I fear there wasn't any! She shouldn't have interfered with family business. And surely not with my _own_ business!" 

"Bastard!" Felice hissed and got up.

Jürgen came slowly nearer.

"Well, at least it was a painless death, I used a fine poison. But yours will not be this peaceful, I fear!"

They started circling each other while Felice feverishly searched for her razor blade.

Damn! She had put it on her bed-side table and forgot to put it back into her pocket again.

"Well, I wonder what little dirty secret she found out about you and those white rats of husbands of yours!" he chirped.

Felice gulped.

"But that's unimportant now. Say goodbye, little cousin!"

Then two things happened simultaneously.

The bathroom door flew open and Trinity rushed in screaming "Hyyyaaahhh!".

And a silver ghost emerged through the carpet and transformed into a whirling shape of silver clothes and rotating blades, grunting "Diiiiieeeee!!!".

In the following chaos Felice decided to duck and crawl towards the door.

Again.

Just as she finally reached the door to get help, a scream from outside was to be heard.

It sounded suspiciously like Niobe.

Jürgen used that second of shock to free himself out of the disaster. He overran Felice and fled out of the room.

Trinity pursued him immediately.

Two helped Felice up from the floor and squeezed her tight.

"I'm ok, really! But that scream!" she groaned and freed herself out of his strong embrace.

Just as she entered the corridor, she was overran a second time.

But this time it was Tom.

Mad cackling he made his way down the corridor. Some small beans hit her face as his boot connected painfully with her stomach.

She heard Two cursing.

And wishing for a gun.

**

As Felice opened her eyes again, she still sat on the floor.

Like Niobe who seemed to be over ran too.

Trinity was there and looked sorrowful down on her.

Her head lay in Two's lap.

Neo was there, too, holding his mop in fighting stance.

"We have to follow them, they have to be arrested!" she heard Morpheus complain who tried to sooth down a cursing Niobe.

Who wished for a gun, too.

"Can you get up, Cherie?" Two asked her tenderly. Trinity blushed and turned away.

"Of course I can!" Felice protested and scrambled to her feet.

"What's that? Tom must have lost them!" she eyed a handvoll of beans that lay on the floor.

"Oh look! Some of them are blue and some are red!"

Morpheus suddenly started coughing.

Niobes eyes flashed dangerously.

"PILLS? YOU´VE TOOK PILLS WITH YOU?? COULDN´T WAIT TO PLAY THE GREAT SAVIOUR AGAIN, COULD YOU?? DAMN MORPHEUS, WE´RE HAVING HOLIDAY!!!" she screamed.

The captain of the Nebuchadnezzar did have the decency to blush a deep crimson red.

Trinity and Neo shuffled their feet.

"Pills? What pills? Could you please explain?" Felice asked irritated. Two made a disappointing noise somewhere deep in his throat.

All four of them were suddenly very eager to capture the two fugitives.

"No time!"

"I'm sorry!"

"Have to go!"

"See you later!"

Felice huffed and took Two's arm.

"Let's follow them; I still have to fleece that dear cousin of mine!"

**

Jürgen cursed.

It had completely gone wrong! The only thing that was now to do was to get as far away as even possible.

Away from this freaky family of his.

Now he didn't have to wonder any more what blackmail poor dead Julia had against little Felice. 

He smiled as he turned around a corner and entered the underground parking.

Maybe that knowledge would come in handy someday when he found a place safe enough!

He approached the van, already seeing the other man sitting in the driver's seat. Furrowing his brow, he quickly closed the van's trunk door. That mustn't happen again! In the end they would loose what they had worked for so hard by pure inattention! He entered the van and told the other to drive off.

"You haven't closed the door!" he said accusingly.

"But I did!" the other opposed.

 "Shit!" Neo cursed as they finally reached the parking. All that was still to be seen of their attackers was a heavy cloud of dust.

"Aargh!!" Felice screamed and threw herself onto Two's chest. One appeared out of his hiding place and joined them. Niobe scolded loudly everything and everybody while Trinity kicked some stones on the ground.

Suddenly she took a closer look.

"Wait a minute. PILLS?"

"Huh?" Morpheus finally woke up out of his trance.

"PILLS! There!" she pointed at the ground.

**

Tom grinned.

It had been a good idea to climb into the van and hide. Once they had left the mansion he would enter the driver's cabin and take over control.

And get help, the police, and the army, whatever!

He fumbled with his pockets. That damn headache was almost unbearable by now!

But what medicine to take? Red or blue?

He climbed over the containers. Now or never!

He stuffed a handful of red _and_ blue pills into his mouth and attacked the driver with a loud scream from behind. 

**

They finally started the pursue.

Unfortunately, there was only one car left to use and that was Trinity's mini cooper.

Neo desperately wanted to drive but that would've meant that Trinity had to sit either on Morpheus lap (death stare from Niobe) or on one of the Twins ("don't you dare"-stare from Twins) laps.

Therefore Morpheus had to drive.

Neo had to sit on the passenger seat with Trinity on his lap (pout from Felice who wanted to sit in front too), in the middle of the back seats sat Niobe (who refused to be left behind), left from her Two (pouting, cause he wanted to drive but then Niobe would have to sit on Morpheus lap) and One on her right side with Felice on his lap (grinning because he could use the opportunity to "grope" his own wife).

"THERE IT IS! THERE´S THE VAN!!" Trinity suddenly screamed and leaned that deep out of the window that the whole car made a jump to the right.

"Aaarghh!" (Morpheus, angry)

"Ouch!"      (Neo, who got Trin´s elbow right into his stomach)

"Ahem, One, you don't need to hold on to my breasts. They are grown tight at my chest _and they won't fall off!!" (Felice, in a very compromising situation)_

"@€**'###!!!"  (Two, jealous)

 "I'm hungry!"   (Niobe, bored)

The van, witch was ca. 50 meters in front of them, suddenly started to sway.

"Watch out!" Morpheus cried.

Then the van tipped over and started burning.

Morpheus stopped the car near it. Very quietly they got out and watched the scenario.

There was no sign of life.

**

"…..couldn´t be identified yet…parts of a female corpse…counterfeit money…" 

Resolutely, Trinity turned the radio off and looked at Morpheus. Finally she dared to ask.

"What happens when you take both pills at the same time?"

Morpheus looked at the other side of the room where Felice and the Twins were talking to Felices mother.

"Honestly, I don't know." He answered.

**

On board of a ship that by chance passed the matrix´ breeding fields.

"Captain?"

"Yes?"

"I'm not sure, but I think I've seen someone down there!"

"Do we have any people to free on the list for today?"

"No, Sir!"

"Then I couldn't think of any way a human could be down there!"

"Yes, Sir!"

"Michael?"

"Yes, Sir?"

"We're going home in a minute!"

**

Awww, poor Tom…

There's still an epilogue to be written, mind you!

I've spent a whole afternoon and half of the evening writing this so please review (I won't bite!)!!


	15. All she wanted was a bath!

Disclaimer: I do not own the Matrix.

This is not the long awaited end.

Instead it's just a little love scene which I would like to dedicate to Dylan, who poked me that long and merciless with an imaginary stick till I finally wrote it.

Enjoy!! 

**

*pling*

*pling*

Mother of pearl-colored bubbles exploded with a gentle noise as Felice dived deeper into the king sized bathing tub sitting on One´s lap, her head snuggled against his smooth white chest, eyes closed. A deep content sigh escaped her throat as his left arm snaked around her waist while his right reached for a fluffy sponge.

"Relaxing my dear?" he purred and trailed small kisses from her exposed collarbone up to her ear.

"Mmnhh..." was the lazy answer.

He grinned definitely smug and received a scowl from Two, who had to sit on the opposite side of the tub (yes, exactly where the unavoidable stopper is).

One´s grin widened even more, reaching almost his ears, as he slowly took the sponge and carefully applied some bathing gel on it.

*Jealous?*

*That was unfair!* Two grumbled.

One slowly began to massage Felice´s slender shoulder.

More bubbles got up and exploded.

*You just weren't fast enough!* One teased his twin.

Two's scowl deepened.

One let the sponge glide beneath the water surface and gained a small but delicious moan.

*You phased into this tub 0, 01 sec. before I did!* Two corrected.

*As I said you weren't fast-

*Stop it!* Felice had joined the mental conversation.

*But I-

*I said stop it!* 

*You just can't loose, can you?* One couldn't stand the temptation of a final blow.

*Hey!*

*Grrrrr* Two grinded his teeth.

*Both of you: STOP IT!!*

*But he started-

*I didn't-

 Felice snaked out a leg towards Two's end of the bathing tub, like a milky white arrow underneath a soft moving cover of shimmering bubbles.

*Pling*

*Pling*

Suddenly Two jerked up, a look of utter surprise written on his face.

One raised an eyebrow.

Slowly, very slowly, Two's sun glasses slipped down his nose.

Into the water.

Felice snickered.

Now it was One´s turn to scowl.

"Could you please shot your mouth? You look like a gold fish!"

No response.

One started drumming his fingernails impatiently.

"Please?"

Slowly, Two's lithe form sank back into the hot milky water a smug grin softening his former scowling lavender tinted lips.

He seemed to enjoy his self immensely.

With sudden realization One dawned the whereabouts of Felice´s right foot.

Two's grin widened.

"Heeey!"

Felice snickered. Men!

"Really One, could you _please_ shut your mouth? You look like a gold fish!" Two purred laviciously.

"What did he do to deserve that? I mean, I was the one with the sponge and-

Felice sighed. They were like little boys sometimes. 

While One continued ranting about how life was unfair and Two apparently decided to set new standards of how smug a man could grin, she reached out beneath the water till she grasped something awful familiar. 

Ok, she corrected herself, her boys were not exactly _those little._

However, the movement made One stop in mid-speech.

*Pling*

*Pling*

*Splash*

A second pair of sun glasses fell into the water.

She could feel One shudder against her back in delight.

One himself had problems to shut his mouth.

God, that woman had a grip like a vice!

And he would not give his twin the satisfaction of seeing him twitching like a madman.

Although he wanted to.

A quick glance into his twin's eyes showed that Two had to struggle with similar problems.

Robbed of the usually safety of his glasses, Two's rising arousal was not to be mistaken. 

His pupils were dilated that much that you almost couldn't see his beautiful silver colored irises.

The smugness had vanished from his mouth step by step, leaving quivering and for breath grasping lips behind.

Lips so much like his own.

There was even some foam in their faces.

And then, just a tiny step away from the peak of lust, the conquest of paradise, the triumph of desire...that woman, their _own_ wife, had the guts to stop for the split of a second.

With a devilish smile Felice used her free hand and reached for the glass of expensive red wine that stood on a nearby tray.

Right next to the book she had planned to read while bathing and relaxing before she went to bed.

Naturally, that was before the twins got wind of her taking a bath.

She held the glass against the light and admired the deep crimson color of her favourite beverage.

The twins looked at her like she had gone nuts.

She took a deep sip and smiled.

Trinity had told her about their previous encounter with the twins and she briefly considered saying "Chateau Haut-Brion 1959, magnificent wine, I love French wine!" but she didn't want to push their buttons too far.

Instead she put the glass away and smiled at Two, who was trying to collect what was left of his dignity.

"Could we move along?" he finally croaked.

"Say please!" she chirped.

"What??" Two flared up.

"I won't-

Felice experimentally waggled her toes, Two shuddered.

"Say it!"

You could tell the poor man really had to wrestle with his temper!

"Please, please, please, please!!!"

"That was all I wanted to hear, honey!" Felice grinned and continued.

A little more white in that already milky bath wouldn't hurt.

*Pling*

*Pling*

*Pling*

Mother of pearl colored bubbles exploded on Felices dark wet hair and filled the air with a sweet fragrance. She closed her eyes and relaxed.

From behind One took the almost empty glass out of her hand and took the last sip of wine.

Then he carefully placed it back on the tray.

"You know, Cherie..." he started.

"We owe you for that!" finished Two with a sly grin.

Felice dived deeper into the water.

"I hope so!"

"I really do!"

*Pling*

** 

Should I write a sequel to this?

Review and I´ll look what I can do ;-)!!


	16. You can leave your hat on!

I knew this took a time but here's the second part of the love scene!

**

„You've lost!" Two grinned smugly.

"Again!" One added grinning.

"#%&(!!!" Felice grumbled underneath her breath.

She just knew it.

She shouldn't have agreed to play cards with those two **censored**.

Two leaned back in his chair and reached for the piece of paper where they counted each one's gains and losses. So far Two had won four rounds, One even six and she only one.

Damn!

One winked at her unmistakably.

Shit.

The troubles were...

The stakes.

There was no way one of the Twins would even consider playing without the prospect of something other to win than a short moment of feeling superior.

No way.

"Okay, okay! You've won! Are you happy now?" she hissed.

Just more smirking.

"Well if there isn't anymore to do I'm going to bed now!" Felice chirped and tried to sneak out of the kitchen.

Two caught her at the sleeve as she brushed past him.

Felice sighed.

"Not so fast my dear..." he purred.

"You owe us something Love!" One reminded her smugly.

Here it comes, Felice thought.

"And what do you want?"

One looked at his brother, grinning.

"Shall I wash the car, bring you breakfast to the bed or should I peel you a grape?"

Two scratched his chin and smiled.

"Oh...I think it should be something special, shouldn't it?"

"Yes, definitely! Something we haven't had yet..." One chimed in.

Felice rolled her eyes.

Perfect!

"We want..."

They looked at each other and nodded.

"We want a strip!"

**

"YOU WANT WHAT??" Felice screamed.

"A strip." Two said dryly.

"You've accepted the rules and according to them we have a wish free." One added in the same dry voice.

"That's ridiculous!" Felice snapped.

"There's no way I'm doing that!"

"Well you could still be our slave for the next two weeks." the corners of Two's mouth was twitching now sadistically.

"Yep, our sex slave!" she could barely hear One mumble under his breath.

Felice glared at him and crossed her arms protectively over her chest.

"Oh come on there's nothing we haven't seen yet Cherie!" Two said with a hint of humour.

Grrrr!

"What are you waiting for? We will give you thirty minutes to prepare and then we will enter the bedroom! Better be quick!" One said.

Felice stormed into the bed room and slammed the door shut behind her back.

Bastards!

**

Think, Felice think! There must be a way to turn the tables!

Sex slave, ha!

Felice locked the door and opened the dresser.

They wanted a show?

They would have their show and when she finally was done with them they would see who would be the slave here!

Her lips curled into an evil smile that would have brought tears of pride into her old father's eye.

**

"She should be ready by now!" One said, constantly checking his watch.

"She still has another 3, 5 minutes. Leave her be!" Two said.

Sometimes One was a bit overzealous.

"We haven't been too strict with her this time, have we?" One asked worried.

Felices look could have melted steel like ice in the sunshine.

"Nah, sometimes a man has to do what a man has to do!" 

"I wonder what she will wear..." One licked his lips in anticipation.

Two joined into his brother's bright smile as they remembered the various dessous they had gifted Felice with since they knew her. She was angry now, yes she was, but they knew she would hold her word like she always did. They would have their strip.

And they would reward her well.

Like they always did, of course.

"What's that noise?" One suddenly said.

"Huh?"

The sound of furniture being shoved over the floor was now to be heard.

"What is she doing in there?" One asked curiously.

Two sighed and got up from his chair.

That girl had always been crazy!

**

Just as Two was about to knock at the bed room door (he of course _could_ have phased in but that would have ruined the evening for both of them and Felice was gradually getting better in throwing a knife) there was music to be heard from the inside.

*Tatataaa tataaaa tataaaa*

One and Two looked at each other highly rattled. 

"She's planning something!" One suspected.

Felice wasn't a person who gave in this easily.

He knocked lightly.

"May we come in now, your time is up!"

Instead of an answer the music was just getting louder.

One cautiously opened the door and then stepped in. Two followed.

The light was dimmed and Felice was nowhere to be seen. Two lonely chairs stood in front of the dresser.

One shrugged and sat down.

Two narrowed his eyes.

"Felice I know that you're inside the dresser! Get out you can't avoid the-

One cut off his little speech by pulling him onto the second chair. The music got louder now.

"Baby take off your coat real slow"

The dresser's doors flew open and Felice stepped outside, turning her back towards them.

She was wearing a long black coat and a black man's hat.

Two raised an eyebrow. That promised to get interesting!

"Baby take off your coat real slow

 Take off your shoes

 I'll take off your shoes girl

 Take off your dress yes, yes, yes"

Felice peeled out slowly off the coat. Under that she wore a black pinstripes suit and a terribly prim and proper looking high closed white blouse.

Two started sweating.

She had borrowed one of their ties!

They knew Felice in dessous, Felice in leather, Felice in vinyl, Felice in fur, Felice in nothing but lipstick.

But Felice in clothes that screamed "Don´t look at me and by no means think about what I´m wearing under these and don´t even think of touching me" was new to them.

Next to him One started to get jumpy. He had discovered that a black bra was shining through the white material of the blouse.

"You can leave your hat on

 You can leave your hat on

 You can leave your hat on"

Felice now leaned over One's lap while taking of the jacket.

One started grinning like an idiot and reached for her.

*SLAP*

She kicked the heel of her pumps into his chest.

"Ooof!" One slumped back into his chair.

"Go over there turn on the lights, all the lights

 Come over here, stand on that chair

 Baby that's right  

 Raise your arms up in the air

 And now shake em"

Now Felice turned over to Two for a little lap dance.

He stared at her chest. That horrible blouse made her breasts looking incredibly big and ...and...

Felice removed the tie and used it to lasciviously bind him to his chair.

Then she opened the first two buttons and practically let Bibi and Bijou (as they silently called them) bounce under his nose.

One sent him a jealous glare.

He decided to be brave and reached for them.

*SLAP*

One snickered evilly at the sight of the red hand shaped imprint that started to illuminate Two's pale face.

Felice got off his lap and peeled out off the blouse and allowed One to open the zipper of her pants.

She turned their back to them turned forward and pulled them down, revealing a peach shaped firm ass in black lace French knickers.

"You give me reason to live

  You give me reason to live

  You give me reason to live

  You give me reason to live"

Then Felice started dancing, in nothing more than underwear and her hat.

"Where the hell did she learn that?" Two whispered.

"Who cares?" One cheered.

"Sweet Darling

 You can leave your hat on

 You can leave your hat on

 You can leave your hat on

 You can leave your hat on"

The bra flew and landed on One's lap.

"That's unfair!" Two complained loudly.

The knickers landed on his lap.

"I didn't say a word!"

"You can leave your hat on

  You can leave your hat on

  You can leave your hat on

  You can leave your hat on"

"Now does this fulfil our bargain?" Felice purred.

"Yes, yes completely! Now can we...?"

"Was that strip really to your totally satisfaction?" she asked.

"Yes, absolutely! Now would you please...?" One moaned and started unbuttoning his own shirt.

"And I don't owe you any longer?" Felice asked innocently.

"No, no, no!!" Two breathed while pulling off his pants in a hurry.

"Oh, okay." Felice said and reached for her under wear.

"What do you think you're doing there?" Two asked.

"I'm getting dressed!" Felice simply replied.

"But why?"

Felice smiled down on two half naked albinos.

"But sex wasn't part of the bargain my dear!" she teased and got into her pants.

"??"

"Look, you wanted a strip and you got a strip."

 "Yes, but..."

She reached for the blouse but Two caught her wrist.

"What...do..we..have..to..do..to..make..you..stay??" he croaked.

Felice sat down on the bed and played with the hat.

"What about being my sex slaves dor the next two weeks?"

**

Liked it?

Then please review!!


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